Here's my letter to National Main Street about diversity, inclusion, Develop New Albany and non-transparency.

Earlier in the week, we issued an emergency hubris status report.

A contest to boycott: Read in amazement as Develop New Albany claims to have revitalized downtown all by itself.

I decided to write a letter to Develop New Albany's parent organization, the National Main Street Center, and this is where matters turn odd, because DNA is not listed as being a member.

Turning to the map, Jeffersonville Main Street is listed as a member, but not Develop New Albany.

And yet at DNA's home page, clear as the ties that bind the organization to the mayor's office:

Very strange. Probably just a clerical error.

Here is my letter.

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Hello,

Last year, our local Main Street organization (Develop New Albany, or DNA) staged an event called the Taco Walk. It was a successful promotion, but did not come without a price, because DNA indulged in what was, for them, harmless fun; the “leadership” brought sombreros and maracas, and led taco walkers on choruses of the Frito Bandito’s theme song.

It didn’t play well in the community, and it bears noting that DNA subsequently stole the Taco Walk idea from the very community volunteer who brought it to the organization’s attention (she found the stereotyping disturbing).

I’ve been blogging about it ever since.

As long as DNA continues to evade its "Taco Walk" ramifications of stereotyping and cultural appropriation, we'll keep bringing it up.

In 2018, DNA's artlessly purloined Taco Tone Deaf Cultural Appropriation Walk moves forward to May 19, with the Frito Bandito returning as Grand Marshal.

C'mon, DNA: The time has come. A fact's a fact. Taco Walk belongs to her. Why not give it back?

DNA's and the newspaper's masks ... or, thoughts occasioned by an excellent essay called "Meet the man who hides behind a mask."

I’ve tried on numerous occasions to engage DNA in a discussion about this issue; my e-mails and calls have been met with complete stonewalling. I asked for by-laws, and again, no reply. None. I find this somewhat disconcerting given that the organization receives financial support from City Hall.

I bring this to your attention because of this passage from your website.

DIVERSITY & INCLUSION

Guiding Principle - We value, respect, and support the diverse views and contributions of our colleagues and partners. We are at our best when supporting diverse perspectives, backgrounds, and experiences.

In action - We strive to use differences to fuel our creativity and positively impact our work, culture, practices, and relationships. We integrate the needs of every individual and ensure that the right conditions are in place for everyone to achieve their potential. We ask for, listen to, and consider diverse points of view in order to succeed as an organization.

If DNA refuses to so much as discuss its cultural appropriation and stereotyping publicly, how exactly is it adhering to this section of the parent group’s expectations?

By extension, what are our options as a community to somehow convince DNA to communicate about such issues? It’s not a real dialogue if only one party participates.

Perhaps National Main Street has no qualms about this issue; if so, that’d be disappointing. However, I hope you might be able to help me with answers.

Thanks,

Roger A. Baylor

(one-time board member of DNA, circa 2007-2010)

A contest to boycott: Read in amazement as Develop New Albany claims to have revitalized downtown all by itself.

Sighhh: DNA's board ... "leading" again.

Before examining this remarkable exposition of hubris, which purports to explain why you should cast daily ballots for Develop New Albany's bid to win a grant, let's examine the contest.

The goal of the America's Main Streets contest is to help promote the importance and strong economic benefits of these Main Streets and the small businesses that help them thrive. Please help us by nominating and telling us about a deserving Main Street. The winning Main Street will receive $25,000 in cash and related prizes to help revitalize that Main Street (Independent We Stand).

As you're reading DNA's bid, keep these words in mind: "The small businesses that help them (Main Streets) thrive."

DNA gives cursory mention to these indie businesses, but in effect, the board claims credit for the time and money invested by the start-ups, with which DNA has had nothing whatever to do.

It's a safe bet that none of these investments came from a budding entrepreneur thinking "Wow -- let's operate in downtown New Albany because there's a Jingle Walk, and a Taco Walk, and a Farmers Market."

It boggles the mind and staggers the imagination. Compare the tone of DNA's contest entry with that of Jeffersonville's ... and shake your head. Of course, there's an unresolved issue: As long as DNA continues to evade its "Taco Walk" ramifications of stereotyping and cultural appropriation, we'll keep bringing it up.

Now reach for your arrogance sickness bags and endeavor to digest a plate of half-baked tripe.

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NEW ALBANY, IN

http://www.developna.org

Through the efforts of volunteers in our community, the leadership of our Board of Directors and working in partnership with local government officials, Downtown New Albany is alive with new businesses, restaurants and retail stores.

In the past 10 years more than 100 new businesses have moved into downtown New Albany and the vast majority of those businesses being locally owned and operated. In the past, many Downtown businesses have struggled to survive while many Historic Downtown buildings sat empty and some of the businesses migrated out of the downtown area to new locations in the suburbs. Our many historic building facades could provide only a fading glimpse to what was for more than 150 years, a thriving Downtown. Downtown New Albany was an industrial center and Indiana's largest city for a period of more than 30 years during the 1800's. Our Main Street along with the rest of Historic Downtown and Midtown New Albany is on the National Register of Historic Places as an Ohio River Town. This is certainly not an uncommon story across the state and across the country. Historic Downtown areas with diminishing tax bases, boarded up buildings, deteriorating infrastructure and most significantly a general apathy to do anything about it. It's unfortunately all too common. Some of Develop New Albany's Signature Events are the Historic Home Tour, Be Local Business Expo, and JingleWalk/HolidayFest. These events generate financial support for a variety of downtown programs. We have a thriving year round Farmer's Market that had close to 50,000 visitors last year! This grant money would help us continue to help our city thrive! One of our focuses for the next few years is to bring more art to downtown. This grant would go such a long way in achieving that!

Democratic cesspool redux: Gahan, Dickey and Phipps want to remove Lorch as council counsel so Danny Boy will be happy again.

Before trying to grasp why Jeff Gahan and Adam Dickey want to be rid of a reliably Democratic city council attorney, it's important to understand the current balance of political power in the city of New Albany.

Gahan, who insists on thinking of himself as a Democrat despite voluminous practical evidence to the contrary, nonetheless probably stands at the apex of his career as mayor. All the civic levers are in his hands. Appointed committees move the slush into proper beak-wetting channels. There isn't a newspaper willing or able to look past the song and dance to the stench beneath. It seems that Gahan is untouchable, and for the moment, he probably is.

However, there is one complicating factor looming increasingly large in Gahan's rear view mirror. The 2015 election cycle brought three Republicans to seats on the city council for the first time in recent memory. One seat already was independent (Scot Blair), and then Dan Coffey defected from the Democratic Party, leaving the tally at 4 Democrats, 3 Republicans and 2 Independents.

In 2016, the Floyd County Democratic Party recorded its second consecutive county-wide electoral debacle, and now Gahan and those four council Democrats are the last bloc standing. The county, state and nation are solid red. No longer assured of a rubber-stamp council shoo-in, as when the tally was 7-1-1 during Gahan's first term, measures must be taken to assure a fifth vote when necessary.

As such, Blair and Coffey are wild cards. They cannot form their own bloc, and so their votes are available to rent in terms of political favors.

We began seeing the dimensions of this new power balance during January's first council meeting, when longtime council president and congenital Gahan yes-man Pat McLaughlin was re-elected 6-3, turning back a challenge from Al Knable with the help of both independent council members.

Blair happily conceded that he shopped his vote for McLaughlin, and why shouldn't he? It's reality, and the way an independent must operate. Concurrently, no one ever seriously doubted that Coffey's move away from the Democratic Party was tactical; better to make one's political capital worth a favor or three than be taken for granted by fellow office holders you detest.

Thus, we are magically transported to last evening's second January council meeting, and the evening for appointments. Last night with tired, mezcal-infused eyes rolling, I surveyed the wreckage of the Human Rights Commission

Gee, CM Phipps, we're mystified as to why the New Albany Human Rights Commission is moribund.

Thursday's drama began when Matt Nash motioned to extend the contract of longtime council attorney (and active Democratic Party member) Matt Lorch. With Bob Caesar mercifully absent, it immediately became apparent that fellow Democrat Greg Phipps was not going to provide a second to Nash's motion.

Coffey verbally objected to the motion, placing him as in favor of terminating Lorch. Knable intervened and an agitated discussion ensued, centering on the power of the president (McLaughlin) in such cases. It now appeared that the Republicans and Nash were in favor of Lorch's continuance, the remaining Democrats against, and Blair mum. Eventually the can was kicked down the road to the next meeting.

The Green Mouse subsequently has suggested that the impetus to remove Lorch emanates directly from Gahan and Democratic Party chairman Dickey, with council Democrats expected to rally around an inexorably wilting flag.

What are we to conclude from all his?

The only rational conclusion based on available evidence is that Coffey's price for rejoining council Democrats, thus providing the necessary fifth vote in those rare occasions when Gahan hasn't already fixed outcomes through appointed committees, is Lorch's head on a platter. Coffey's disdain for Lorch is well documented, and the Copperhead previously served as one of Gahan's chief spear-carriers until the checks stopped coming. Rapprochement serves multiple purposes.

In this scenario, the checks to the Wizard of Westside resume, sparing Gahan the necessity of negotiating with Blair, whom he loathes.

However, taking these machinations at face value, it remains unclear whether Nash is bucking the party establishment, or merely seeks to do the right thing, a commodity quite rare on his side of the aisle.

It's perfectly clear that the wheels are coming off what remains of the Floyd County Democratic Party. If we were to send a drone aloft to gaze at the respective checking accounts of local Democrats and Gahan's political action committee, we'd find a huge disparity. The mayor is hugely flush, and Dickey's oxcart tapped dry (ethically as well as financially).

Gahan surely is dictating Lorch decapitation terms. Dickey has no choice, and no backbone even if he did. Coffey gets back on the train, and Phipps isn't even bothered to rehearse his increasingly trite Hamlet routine. Caesar and McLaughlin both want to be mayor. Blair continues to be cast out by both parties, and a Republican likely will win the next mayoral contest in any event.

Do you have an alternative scenario? Let me know. The entertainment won't last forever, and it helps take our minds off the inauguration.

Earning stripes? A hands-down winner in the safe streets t-shirt contest.

The Green Mouse has selected a winner: Only malcontents favor safe streets, so let's have a t-shirt.

But there's even more: "My entry is attached. $100 on Amazon if you need one in real life."

Rust-Oleum 2395000 Professional Striping Machine

Product Description
A quality line marker for use on grass/dirt fields and for marking parking lots/lanes. Sturdy steel construction with 4 large easy rolling wheels. Lightweight housing includes windscreen, fingertip on/off lever, storage for 12 extra cans and simple 2" - 4" line width adjustment. Non-toxic aerosol spray goes straight downward for complete coverage. Maintenance free, no messy clean up.

From the Manufacturer
Rust-Oleum Striping Machine makes it easy to apply sharp, crisp, consistent lines.

Yes indeed, Jim. I think I will.

Name That Boondoggle Episode 3: The Main Street "improvement" project really should be called ...

In one week, our long civic nightmare will be concluded. But look at the havoc they're wreaked.

Team Gahan Boondoggle Name: East Main Street Improvement Project.

Roger's Boondoggle Name: Avenue des Champs-ÉlyGahanshima (pronounced, "those contractors gave my campaign a shitload of  money")

Your Boondoggle Name: ???

Indicate your choice in the comments, either here or at Fb. The winner receives absolutely nothing except plaudits for cleverness amid the Gahanshima (from the Romanian word Ceaușima, explained here).

Name That Boondoggle Episode 2: The water park really should be called ...

Team Gahan Boondoggle Name: River Run Family Water Park.

Roger's Boondoggle Name: Water Breaking Bad Family TIF Park.

Your Boondoggle Name: ???

Indicate your choice in the comments, either here or at Fb. The winner receives absolutely nothing except plaudits for cleverness amid the Gahanshima (from the Romanian word Ceaușima, explained here).

Name That Boondoggle Episode 1: The apartments at the Coyle site really should be called ...

Team Gahan Boondoggle Name: The Breakwater.

Roger's Boondoggle Name: Break Wind Flats ... or The Lofts at Duggins-Down.

Your Boondoggle Name: ???

Indicate your choice in the comments, either here or at Fb. The winner receives absolutely nothing except plaudits for cleverness amid the Gahanshima (from the Romanian word Ceaușima, explained here).

NAC's "Toxicity-Wide" levee lettering contest.

My friend M inquires: Should we rearrange the rocks to something more appropriate to the New Albany experience? There are no rewards for offering the winning answer, because I always forget to pay them.

Enter the baking contest at the LCBW/New Albany Strassenfest on Saturday, September 25.

Saturday, September 25: Strassenfest in New Albany

Thanks to Sandra Terrell for organizing the contest, and stay tuned for further information about Strassenfest next Saturday. Questions? Ask me, and I'll get them into the proper mailbox.

Here are the three finalists for our caption contest: "What Otis said."

Matt Nash
"Mr. Price says I can trade in this cow for some nickels and dimes and a handful of magic beans."

SBAvanti63
"So there are potty police. Well, this is my pet, Sewer. He's a cash cow."

bluegill
"But Steve told me to get a big ol' dog. There's criminals around here."

Thanks to readers who suggested a caption. The senior editor has chosen his top three, and now you can vote for the winner. Indicate your preference in the comments section.

Original post: Caption contest: What Otis said.

Caption contest: What Otis said.

We've heard about CM Price's recent bout of Mayberry-envy, which included a reference to today's police being too harsh on those unfortunates nabbed for public intoxication, but in the composite photo above, what is Otis saying in response?

Submit your entries as a comment. The senior editor chooses the winner, and the grand prize is a Progressive Pint at the Bank Street Brewhouse.