It's a Christmas miracle -- though when it comes to Bill Allen's shit hole properties on Main Street, even Santa knows better than to dream.

This morning there was some sort of clean-up operation underway in the outdoor cockroach dining area of notorious slumlord attorney Bill Allen's collection of neglected properties on the corner of Main and 3rd. It seems a shame to make all the rats homeless for the holidays, but when it comes to this collection of purposeful dilapidation, any news is good news.

What a community parasite.

If I were ordinance enforcement, I'd follow the wagon to make sure the contents aren't dumped illegally on the side of the road -- or at one of Allen's other trashy buildings.

But he sure has a nice house up in Silver Hills, eh?

It's forever noteworthy the way that none of Allen's residential neighbors (including Floyd County Prosecutor Keith Henderson) would tolerate squalor in their neighborhood the magnitude of which has been allowed by Allen at his Main & 3rd dump.

Bill Allen, if you're reading ... nah, there's no need to say it aloud.

How does Bill Allen get away with this pile? Is he a Ginkins-level donor to Jeff Gahan, or what?

Why is Deaf Gahan more eager to terrorize public housing residents than enforce codes v.v. the likes of Bill Allen?

Maybe Billy's waiting for some of that Horseshoe Foundation beautification cash -- but what a perfect re-location site for City Hall.

As is.

Irv Stumler set to lecture BOW about property safety on the 200 block of East Main Street. He is not expected to address street safety amid monster trucks.

The pulpit's gonna be rocking. It says so right here, in the Board of Public Works and Safety agenda for Tuesday, July 12.

Surely Irv intends to mention Bill Allen's perennial eyesore at 213 and 215 East Main. That nice, new steeple -- and this same old act of public vandalism.

Will he also include the corner of 202 E. Main ... but didn't I hear that it had been sold to a local developer?

I'm going to edge out on a limb here and suggest that Irv will not mention other daily threats to public safety.

Is there a safety exemption for mechanical fetishes?

Bill Allen's shit hole properties on Main Street -- now with a street couch amid the merry rubble.

As I was walking down the street one day -- Main Street, Wednesday morning, to be exact -- it seemed that Bill Allen finally had taken steps to improve his dilapidated shit hole of a building.

With vibrant used sidewalk furniture.  

It must have been a "pay the slumlord rent" sale. Concurrently, the views are as inspiring as always, and the shyster probably still want a few million for his pile of neglected bricks.

A couple of months back, at least someone tired of viewing the breathtaking propaganda ...

... and made a citizen's cleanup.

For all these reasons and so many others, there can be only one reasonable response to Bill Allen.

Bill Allen's shit hole properties on Main Street are decades-long festering eyesores.

Bill Allen's shit hole properties on Main Street are decades-long festering eyesores.

Remember back in 2012, when the city "got real tough" with Denny Andres and his State Street dump truck depot ... before hastily sounding the bugle for a retreat that has lasted for three years?

Just have one question: How is Bill Allen's building on Main Street any different?

Ah, yes; the sheer grandeur of sidewalk furniture when the Google street view cameraman comes rolling past.

These enduring symbols of New Albany's futility belong to a cadaverous 115-year-old lawyer who hasn't given a shit for longer than most of us have been alive, although back in 2012, he bought a few gallons of paint and declared victory.

In fact, we were so enamored of Allen's 2012 paint job that the blog selected him Person of the Year for 2012.

Bill Allen an early 2013 Pillar Award front runner with stunning Main Street paint job.

I can hear City Hall now: "But Main Street Improvement Project."

Let's put it this way: Bill Allen isn't laughing WITH us.

Well, why wouldn't he want a piece of the creative action?

As Allen filled out the entry forms for yet another Develop New Albany Pillar Award, he asked to no one in particular, "Why let those Knobs boys have all the fun and profit?"

Public Art Scene Self-Love In The Ruins.

Bill Allen an early 2013 Pillar Award front runner with stunning Main Street paint job.

Before!

After!

Potemkin sheen, or the sheer grandeur of Bill Allen's block.

Last month at NAC: "Do we commend the building's owner for doing something/anything after these many years, or do we ask inconvenient questions about facades vs. structural soundness? Or do we just keep drinking?"

Nice. At least he's painting the plywood window coverings.

Mike Kopp posted this on Twitter earlier today. Do we commend the building's owner for doing something/anything after these many years, or do we ask inconvenient questions about facades vs. structural soundness? Or do we just keep drinking?