We can't quote Gahan on neighborhood crime because he won't address it publicly.

Yesterday we had a look-see at the progress regress of this year's campaign to date, during which Slick Jeffie and the DemoDisneyDixiecrats have focused almost entirely on the mayor's ability to obey state law and produce a suitable annual budgetary snapshot.

As Gahan carpet-bombs Seabrook with HWC's cash, there is no discussion about real issues. Hmm, do you think that's intentional?

Republicans have not been the only listeners who've responded by suggesting we speak instead about Gahan's massive accumulated debt, but as an example of what's being missed, consider neighborhood crime.

Our friend D shared this thought on Facebook. It might be the best expression of the way optics propel Gahan in Oz; it's all about how things appear, and never about whether they actually function.

"To your point re: 'We've not heard an exchange of ideas about opioid use, drug addiction or their corollaries of neighborhood crime.' As someone (one of many in our community) who has been personally affected by drug-induced/related crime at my home, I reached out to one of Gahan's handlers earlier this year to see if we could get the Mayor (and perhaps the Chief) to host a town hall meeting to discuss what we as citizens could do to help police in their efforts to make our community safer.

"I'm quoting the response I received, 'That might be good for your neighbors and the community, but that wouldn't be good for Jeff.'

"I was told that they'd circle back to the idea after the primary. Now, call me crazy, but if our elected officials are doing it right, isn't what's good for the community and its citizens ALSO good for our elected officials? Apparently not in this version of New Albany, Indiana."

D not unexpectedly adds that Team Gahan hasn't gotten around to holding this meeting, even post-primary. Grassroots organizing has proceeded as City Hall keeps their efforts at arm's length, terrified of how it might make the Genius of the Floodplain look in reality, as opposed to fantasy.

I can hear Greg Phipps now: "But he bulldozed the homeless camp, didn't he?"

Election 2019: The buying and selling of a city, or our updated master list of 73 Gahan wheel-greasers, a veritable pornographic potpourri of pay-to-play.

These 30 free-spending special interest donors top Jeff Gahan's 2019 pay-to-play campaign finance windfall of $150,000 (so far).

CFA-4 Follies: OMG, just look at Gahan's huge pile of special interest donor cash flowing to out-of-towners.

Courtesy of Dan Coffey, the Grant Line Road annexation map that Jeff Gahan doesn't want you to see.

Current councilman and forthcoming mayoral candidate Dan Coffey (Independent) has made public the map showing the Grant Line Road area north of IU Southeast being projected for annexation by Jeff Gahan's monetization cadres.

This is the area the city is looking to annex. While we are told not to openly discuss this with the public, I believe we should have an open and transparent government that allows public input to help make a better and informed decision.

Absolutely right. I agree with Coffey and thank him for the map. Here's a closer look at the pertinent data.

Coffey is correct in observing that much of the annexation discussion so far has been strictly back-channel.

However the topic began leaking out when the NA-FC school corporation's administrators recently informed the school board, seeing as the corporation must voluntarily accept Grant Line Elementary's inclusion.

This was the first time most folks became aware of the proposal, although an overview of the annexation plan was discussed at last week's city council meeting, with all involved stressing that nothing can occur in 2019 because annexations aren't permitted by the state during pre-census years.

Even yurt-dwellers in Mongolia can see that Team Gahan lusts after the $1.85 million yearly tax haul, but at last week's meeting Scott "Coulda Been a Contender" Wood explained if the annexation becomes official, there's a period of three years during which residents in the annexed area are obliged by the state to form some undefined manner of participatory committee and to designate uses for the tax revenue in question; it does not go automatically into city coffers until the fourth year.

Presumably such committees choose for infrastructure improvements designed to bring the suburb into line with the city's urban "norms." The word "sprawl" was not mentioned, and personally I'm waiting for this future committee to be immediately infiltrated and neutralized by Dear Leader's operatives, with these three years of infrastructure cash inevitably going to pay for the projects already planned by Gahan's campaign finance donors for the vicinity.

Then again, I'm a cynic.

GREEN MOUSE SAYS: Deaf Gahan wants to annex Grant Line Elementary School. Why didn't the Redevelopment Commission discuss this at its last meeting?

At the end of the day it's just another example of Gahan's pathological need for secrecy, and his preference for conducting as much pre-planning as possible outside the public's eye so the ensuing process is subject to full personal control with no meaningful effort to glean public input. 

Folks living along Mt. Tabor Road, and others attending last week's Colonial Manor top-down debacle already know this. Fortunately, there's an antidote to the toxic effects of cash-stuffed envelopes, Rice Krispies Treats and Kool-Aid: #FireGahan2019

---

By the way, if you're not following Deaf Gahan on Twitter, you're missing out: https://twitter.com/DeafGahan

Brutal satire for a city allergic to it, but still.

GREEN MOUSE SAYS: Are NA's dwindling Democrats seeking to wrest control of city elections from the county? Lame, but at least they're not suggesting HWC Engineering do it.

When the Green Mouse drained his double well Scotch in one gulp, I knew something was on his mind.

"I keep saying that Gahanism can't possibly get any weirder, or the Floyd County Democrats any more panic-stricken, and I keep waking up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat, hearing Rod Serling's voice."

"What's he saying to you, Mouse?"

"It goes something like this: 'New Albany is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call the Gahan Zone.' "

"That's purely terrifying."

"Horrible! You know, I need a little break from Dickey World. Someone told me Saudi Arabia's great around Christmas. Wanna go check it out?"

"Nah, think not. At this point I'm paranoid about leaving the elevator on the third floor."

---

Eventually the Green Mouse settled down and passed along the latest morsel from the rumorama -- and he wasn't joking when it comes to weirdness, panic and Democrats coming undone.

The rumor goes something like this: With the Democratic Party's hold on local power having dwindled to the mayor, four council lackeys (five if you count Neville Barksdale) and the city clerk, with the 2019 municipal election cycle fast approaching, and with His Gahanic Majesty's system of fruit-basket-laden political patronage threatened with an entirely unexpected loot-by date, the party's zany elders have resolved a protocol to shift the authority for conducting local elections from the county clerk to city clerk.

I know; the idea is nutzoid, and maybe we can chalk it up to a steady diet of Rice Krispies Treats and Kool-Aid, but then again, the Democrats are donkeys on the edge. They're hanging by a thread in the normally secure urban stronghold, and the party's about to lose control of the county clerk's office, which runs elections.

On November 6, Danita Burks, a Republican, defeated Christy Eurton, the Democrat. Vicki Glotzbach (D) is city clerk; she's up for re-election in 2019, and may not even be aware of the brain bland trust's scheming over Bud Light Lime Pomegranate-A-Ritas at the Roadhouse.

The state of Indiana has this to say about it:

County:

Indiana’s local government includes election administration and voter registration offices in each of the state’s 92 counties. Each county is divided into election precincts, with a total of more than 5,000 precincts in Indiana. All 92 counties have a circuit court clerk elected by the voters and a county election board, which includes the circuit court clerk, to administer local elections.

According to IC 3-5-3-1 the counties and municipalities are responsible for the payment of election expenses including “expenses of voter registration and for all election supplies, equipment and expenses out of the county treasury in the manner provided by law.”

County Clerk, County Board of Registration and County Board of Elections can be found on the Secretary of State’s website, www.sos.in.gov/elections.

The exact formula for the alchemy by which our increasingly intemperate municipal Democrats might secede from their firmly Republican state's own election rule book remains obscure.

Can anyone remember a time when city Democrats maligned the management skills of a county clerk when the latter was a Democrat?

Are Democrats implying that clerk-elect Burks is dishonest when she's yet to be sworn in?

And, if so, isn't the Political Hypocrisy Meter sounding furiously given the self-contradictory chicanery foisted by municipal Democrats on John and Jane Q. Public at every turn?

Speaking personally, this rumor is far-fetched even by New Gahanian standards. Still, the hell of it is that is sounds precisely like something the ruling elites might try to do.

Dynamic Duo resumes control of New Albany city council, Boy Wonder plots next move, and the rest of us drink straight through.

Just some honest horse trading, Shane.

I suppose someone's got to do it, so here is coverage of Thursday evening's city council meeting.

A rumored seismic shift in the council's power base failed to materialize, as indie swing voters played the game the way the game is meant to be played, and extracted their minimum yearly requirement of tasty nutrients from the Dear Leader.

Accordingly, Pat McLaughlin was re-elected to the position of Council President for Life, defeating Al Knable 6 to 3, with Knable's votes coming from GOP council block.

The vote to re-elect Greg Phipps as Vice President was 5 to 3 over David Barksdale, with Scott Blair abstaining.

Local Democratic Party chairman Adam Dickey was in attendance, furiously compiling Mickey Mouse Mash Notes in preparation for his 2018 Indiana House challenge to Ed Clere. By that time, Mayor Gahan should have finished folding Democrats into municipal government as Legally Contracted Janitorial Services for Redevelopment -- though Redevelopment itself is about to double as the New Albany Housing Authority's captive board. More on that next week.

To reiterate, the ideal site for Jeff Gahan Presents New Albany City FC is ready and waiting for the TIF-fueled bulldozers.

Finally, as council was reminded by a Navajo Drive resident who correctly divined that not a single elected or appointed member in New Albany Government Inc. can quote the exact mandated procedure, FOR GOD'S SAKE PICK UP YOUR LEAVES PEOPLE.

The meeting adjourned before 7:30 p.m., and martinis -- only those necessary to cope -- began flowing.

SHANE'S EXCELLENT NEW WORDS: "Down with chicanery -- long live the chicane!"

Welcome to another installment of SHANE'S EXCELLENT NEW WORDS, a regular Wednesday feature at NA Confidential.

Around this time each week, anguished wails begin seeping out of the bunker's ventilation ducts: Why all these newfangled words?

Why not the old, familiar, comforting words, the ones that sufficed during the glory days, in those simpler times before inexplicably naked greed kicked in like a bond-issue-percentage speedball, knocking you back into the turnbuckles but feeling oh so fine, and now, as the Great Elongated and Exasperated Obfuscator of comic book series fame (can Disney World be far behind?) you teach detailed principles of banking to bankers, at least when not otherwise occupied making healthy deposits into your own account?

Thankfully, even if one toils for the Beloved and Respected Leader, a healthy vocabulary isn't about intimidation through erudition. No, not at all. Rather, it's about selecting the right word and using it correctly, whatever one's pay grade or station in life.

Even municipal corporate attorneys reaping handsome remuneration to suppress information and to squelch community dialogue can benefit from this enlightening expansion of personal horizons, and really, as we contemplate CPIs, IUDs and IOUs, all we really have is time -- and the opportunity to learn something, if we're so inclined.

Let's introduce today's word by looking at pictures.

Aviary

Granary

Chicanery

Yes, this week's word will be familiar to anyone who ever attended a Chicanery ... er, make that a Redevelopment Commission meeting. But first, a step back from chicanery to the root word, itself quite ironic in the New Albanian sense.

Chicane (Wikipedia)

A chicane is an artificial feature creating extra turns in a road, used in motor racing and on streets to slow traffic for safety. For example, one form of chicane is a short, shallow S-shaped turn, requiring the driver to turn slightly left and then right again to stay on the road, which slows them down. Chicane comes from the French verb chicaner, which means "to quibble" or "to prevent justice".

Justice through prevention? Sounds reasonable to me. The photo (credit to Wikipedia) shows a chicane as a "type of 'horizontal deflection' used in traffic calming schemes to reduce the speed of traffic." Just our luck. Chicanery's everywhere in New Albany, when what we really need are (in the immortal words of Slim Pickens) a shitload of chicanes.

chicanery
[shi-key-nuh-ree, chi-]

noun, plural chicaneries

1. trickery or deception by quibbling or sophistry: He resorted to the worst flattery and chicanery to win the job

2. a quibble or subterfuge used to trick, deceive, or evade

Origin of chicanery

1605-1615; < French chicanerie. See chicane, -ery

Someone make a banner: "Down with chicanery -- long live the chicane!" We could tie it to a tree ... are any left standing?

Basically, sharrows suck, so naturally New Albany plans more of them, so we can be "bike friendly" on the cheap.

Back in May, we sneered at another of John Rosenbarger's signature megalomanical muddles.

Rosenbarger giveth and He taketh away; thus shall autos be glorified at the Beechwood intersection with Charlestown Road.

 ... Useless bicycle lanes originally marked just a few years ago, which start and end nowhere, and that never were calibrated to guide a cyclist through an auto-centric intersection, now will be rendered even less useful than garden-variety useless ... with the compounded uselessness occurring just a few blocks from Monon Street, where there'll be a brand new park not connected in any way, shape or form to any non-automotive form of transport.

The intersection reboot is complete, and last night I noticed that it includes a new, dramatic step to resolve the bicycle friendliness issue mentioned above. Previously nonsensical and disconnected bicycle lanes now are routed through the automotive cluster muck by means of a sharrows symbol painted on the street.

Like a nightmare, it all came back to me: The city official in August, whom I quite like as a human being, but have never even once seen riding a bicycle, assuring me that New Albany's way forward to status as a red hot, bike friendly town was to have sharrows everywhere instead of more costly measures to actually achieve something.

At their very best, sharrows are a component, as the excerpt below makes clear.

However, in the absence of other (better) street use reform measures, the sharrows notion is little more than propagandistic palaver. Main Street's freshly minted conceptual catastrophe is a fine example. On a street already sufficiently wide to incorporate bicycle paths amid narrowed traffic lanes, we've opted instead for a median and wider traffic lanes, which will speed traffic rather than calm it (speed limit reductions notwithstanding), thus rendering sharrows both useless and potentially dangerous to bicycling novices who don't yet share a general contempt for sharrows as a municipal cop-out.

So what do we intend to do with our opportunity? Talk crap, paint symbols on the asphalt, then move on to build a dog park.

That's the New Albany way, and it's dead wrong -- at some point, probably literally.

Want to Increase Cycling? Sharrows Won’t Cut It, by Angie Schmitt (Streetsblog)

Shared-lane stencils for bikes, a.k.a. “sharrows,” definitely have their place in a balanced and healthy street system. But these friendly reminders to drivers to share the road have their limits as a tool to boost safety and create more inviting streets for biking.

A study by the LA County Bicycle Coalition [PDF] showed that sharrows do little or nothing to encourage new people to take up cycling, the way bike lanes and cycle tracks do.

That’s why communities should not rely on sharrows when more effective interventions are called for. Unfortunately, Sam Ollinger at Bike San Diego says her city has fallen into this trap:

In the last year, San Diegans have seen the increasing number of shared-lane markings, also called “sharrows.” Sharrows are appearing everywhere: Adams Avenue, Park Boulevard, Broadway, El Cajon Boulevard, Grand Avenue, Voltaire Street, Chatsworth Boulevard, Hotel Circle South, Pacific Highway and more. However, these sharrows are being used as a cheap band-aid instead of implementing real change on our roadways that would increase the number of people riding their bicycle for transportation or recreation.

For starters, San Diego’s Bicycle Master Plan recommends sharrows on roadways that are too narrow for bike lanes. Sharrows are recommended on roads that have a minimum width of 14 feet. Bike lanes are recommended on roads that have a minimum of 15-17 feet. El Cajon Boulevard, for example, has three travel lanes in each direction – it has more than enough room for a bike lane.

So how can the City of San Diego increase the percentage of people who ride a bicycle? A recent report [pdf] from the Mineta Transportation Institute, an institute that was established by Congress to research “multimodal surface transportation policy and management issues,” concluded that in order to attract a wide segment of the population, a bicycle network’s “most fundamental attribute should be low-stress connectivity, that is, providing routes between people’s origins and destinations that do not require cyclists to use links that exceed their tolerance for traffic stress, and that do not involve an undue level of detour.”

Rosenbarger giveth and He taketh away; thus shall autos be glorified at the Beechwood intersection with Charlestown Road.

Earlier this morning, we urged someone to tell John Rosenbarger that "Modern bike lanes call for modern reference guides."

Now, let's see how the Rasputin of Redevelopment applies such advice in daily practice. We begin with this newspaper story:

Busy New Albany intersection will soon be upgraded, by Chris Morris (The Moultrie Observer)

One of New Albany’s busiest intersections will soon receive a much needed upgrade, and most of the work will be paid for by the federal government.

The Indiana Department of Transportation met with New Albany city officials, engineering consultants, utility company representatives and contractors this week to coordinate implementation of a $214,792 Beechwood Avenue-Charlestown Road intersection improvement project. The work will include adding a left-hand turning lane on Charlestown Road to Beechwood and a new LED crosswalk and stop light.

Let's take a look at the aerial view.

If you look closely in the bottom left quadrant, you'll see bike lanes on both side of Charlestown Road between the Beechwood intersection. These lanes were triumphantly installed during the most recent England administration, after which the King drank a few bottles of wine. They extend roughly three blocks southwesterly, to terminate quite abruptly at Vincennes Street.

Now, look at this photo, top right-hand quadrant.

The bike lanes stopping short of the intersection on the southwest side do not begin anew until Lincoln Avenue on the northeast side; they run a few hundred yards further to the Silver Street intersection, where they end yet again.

Clearly, while there are two pedestrian crosswalks built into the current Beechwood intersection, there are no delineated bike lanes drawn through it.

Recalling that John Rosenbarger regularly has hailed this situation as proof of his urban design prowess, read on as Chris Morris gives us the LOL punch line.

The city did not have to buy right-of-way to expand the intersection. Rosenbarger said the bike lanes through the intersection will be absorbed for the road expansion.

But as the photos show, there are no bike lanes through the intersection. Three miniature/a> bike lanes have dangled unconnected along Charlestown Road since being installed. In short, more (utter) bullshit, from the city's premier bullshit artist, who'll now point to the elimination of the non-existent as further evidence of his indispensable ability, even as he variously blames politicians, newspaper reporters, drivers, bicyclists, walkers, stupid commoners and the abominable snowmen for the nonsense -- just not that guy in the mirror.

Let's recap.

Useless bicycle lanes originally marked just a few years ago, which start and end nowhere, and that never were calibrated to guide a cyclist through an auto-centric intersection, now will be rendered even less useful than garden-variety useless ... with the compounded uselessness occurring just a few blocks from Monon Street, where there'll be a brand new park not connected in any way, shape or form to any non-automotive form of transport.

And, lest we forget, we're paying Jeff Speck $75,000 to explain just how useless this uselessness really is. Is it any wonder that few of us believe Speck's advice will be heeded?

It makes you wonder: Which Democratic central committee grandee lobbied for the automotive intersection to be made even more auto-centric?

Answer: Probably all of them.

New surge of toll-o-philia grips and debilitates ORBP backers.

This comment on Facebook sums it up.

Here's my prediction... Indiana will complete the east end bridge before Kentucky even thinks about the new downtown bridge and interstate re-working. At that point Kentucky will realize the east end bridge fixed the downtown bridge situation and, the downtown bridge will never be built!

For me, it is simple. I can no longer trust any public official or Bridges Authority member, ever again. That's why I fully expect them to cynically reverse field and toll the bandaged Sherman Minton Bridge, because after all, they've continually altered what was said to be inalterable. Up until the first coin hits the slot, I will continue to oppose the tolling of any bridge, and the construction of a downtown bridge.

The next Bridges Authority meeting is January 5, 2012, 10 a.m., at the Kentucky International Convention Center (221 S. 4th St., Louisville, KY). Anyone know where bulk cream pies might be purchased?

States reach deal on bridges, from wire service reports at OSIN

... Indiana would be responsible for constructing a new bridge across the river at Utica and Prospect, Ky., a new highway linking the Lee Hamilton Expressway and Gene Snyder Freeway, and a tunnel in eastern Jefferson County.

Kentucky would be responsible for building a new Interstate 65 bridge, refurbishing the Kennedy Bridge, modernizing the Kennedy Interchange and expanding the I-65 approach in Indiana.

Tolls would help to cover the cost of construction.

A thought from a walk.

Just in walking around town, I regularly encounter architects, builders, growers, craftspeople, brewers, urban planners, retailers, artists, engineers, vintners, project managers, bankers, designers, and any number of others who are here now, engaged with the community, and ready to work. If anyone tried to tell me that, given the chance, those folks collectively couldn't come up with something better than what Carl Malysz negotiated behind closed doors, then I would tell them that they have a radically different view of this city and its capabilities than I do.

River View.

“Curiouser and curiouser!” Cried Alice (she was so much surprised, that for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good English).

It appears that Jeff Gahan will announce for mayor today, leaving us with three declared choices so far, all Democrats: Gahan, Irv Stumler and the premature-sign-erectioning Paul Etheridge. Apart from other merits and demerits, Gahan's entry gives Democrats disgruntled with the recent Stumler coronation chicanery a place to contentedly roost.

Meanwhile, having hinted at burn-out, the current mayor now sees renewed possibilities in, of all places, the city council. Out of the frying pan -- and into the insane asylum.

The immediate and most obvious question: Why run at-large? Hizzoner resides in Dan Coffey's 1st District. Disregarding the plain weirdness of a three-term mayor making a somewhat less than lateral step, politically, is it that the England camp feels it cannot beat the Copperhead? After all, there is a vastly smaller pool of votes to be, shall we say, "sought" in the 1st. If England feels he cannot overwhelm the Wizard of Westside, does this fact necessarily bode well for an at-large bid? There are many enemies in outlying areas, too.

Can it get weirder? I shouldn't ask that question in New Albany ...

New Albany mayor to run for city council; England says he wants to spend more time with family but still serve, by Daniel Suddeath (Tribune)

England, a Democrat, confirmed Friday he will seek election as an at-large New Albany City Councilman.

Much posturing about absolutely nothing at wasted council yawnfest.

Last night's city council meeting was characterized as "extremely post-menopausal" by a bemused onlooker, who added, "I hope Coffey feels better soon."

Referee Diane Benedetti signaled illegal procedure as Carl Malysz repeated his creative financing plan for the third meeting in a row.

Later, when Benedetti reminded her colleagues that she wears the pants in this spineless jellyfish of a pansy legislative family, council president John Gonder thought long and hard before answering, "Yes, dear."

CM Coffey expressed renewed outrage at the gall of any government employee to ask for more money from impoverished rag pickers like (well, you know), and as a gesture of reconciliation, he offered to reimburse taxpayers for his 2010 council pay. City officials declined, noting that used snake oil still is not legal tender in St. Daniels Land.

And, without the marvelous bounty of La Rosita's, none of it would have been remotely endurable.

Daniel Suddeath provides by-the-numbers coverage of the purely wasted evening: New Albany City Council delays action on balancing budget shortfall; Final vote on $1.7 million appropriation scheduled for Tuesday.

Shockingly, Steve Price was unable to navigate the lofty, icy expanse of Dewey Heights and failed to attend last night's meeting, halting his consecutive meeting starting cliche-spouter record of 143, begun in 2004. Somewhere, someone caught a glimpse of Brett Favre smiling.

Rest assured: He was the only one.

Dalby panics: Help, I'm being muzzled ... Watership Down to Commandante Stemler ... HQ, they're not listening ...

On election eve, as Clarksville's town council emphatically said "no" to tolls, State Senate candidate, Jeffersonville city council member and 1Si endorsee Ron Grooms continued his campaign-long duck and cover on the topic of bridge tolls.

I've probably never enjoyed voting against someone so much, unless it was ... nah, never mind.

Ironically, Monday evening also proved to be the occasion for Jeffersonville's council to consider greasing One Southern Indiana's sweaty outretched and upturned palm.

Public policy committee apologist Michael Dalby was there to ask for continued payment for non-itemized "services rendered," and according to media accounts by the Tribune's David A. Mann and the C-J's Ben Zion Hershberg, several legislators weren't sounding all that eager to meekly pass the K-Y Jelly.

Evidently 1Si's devolution into political advocacy isn't playing well in Jeffersonville, either. Both media articles mention New Albany's "support" for One Southern Indiana, as described in greater detail in this bit from the NAC archive:

Caesar stars in "conflict of interest" night as council approves, but slashes, bucks to 1Si.

... And then there's Bob Caesar, 1Si member, 1Si advocate, 1Si fan, and sometimes even playing at being a councilman in real life. After exercising the most blatant conflict of interest vote since Benedetti's decision not to absent herself from her brother's real estate zoning appearances, Caesar took advantage of a five minute recess (for the purpose of council members receiving their stipends?) to bound across the room, beaming, and land in Michael Dalby's lap. The last time anyone saw giddiness like that, it was probably the high school prom. Unlike the aftermath of the prom, someone in this instance "got some."

Appropriately, reporter Hershberg manages to locate Jeffersonville's own version of Caesar:

“They have been very good to Jeffersonville,” City Council member Ed Zastawny said of One Southern Indiana at Monday night's meeting. “They have brought a lot of jobs here, they have a right to endorse candidates.”

If readers detect anything approximating logic in Zastawny's jobs-to-endorsement linkage, please kneel in the direction of 1Si and chant, "Huzzah."

Meanwhile, there's the inconvenient matter of council member Grooms, seated on a body that considers monetary support for the organization that endorsed him in his bid for office. Seeing as Grooms' staff at Facebook is nowhere near as efficient with their stained cudgels as Rep. Ed Clere's, I actually was able to post this comment on Grooms' Facebook site:

"Thank you for ducking the tolling issue to the bitter end. Your paymasters at ISi deeply appreciate it. By the way, will you be voting on the council funding to the organization that endorsed you?"

Start your egg timers; I neither (a) expect the comment to stand, nor (b) believe there'll be an answer.

Finally, on the whole topic of 1Si's dizzying descent into a quivering, servile arm of Kerry Stemler's right-wing proclivities, here's my FB status for today:

"The corporate oligarchs and rabid theocratic fundamentalists who pull the Republican party's strings thank you for believing the propaganda and voting GOP. But why ruin a perfectly good day talking about One Southern Indiana?"

I'll be voting accordingly.

And some not so great news...

TARC's entire 2011 budget: $63.5 million

Amount pledged to Bridges Project in 2011 by Kentucky Legislature: $185 million

And we're told we had no choice but to cut public transit services (about $5.5 million for the year) because we just can't afford them.

NASH: Council needs to do its duty.

NASH: Council needs to do its duty

The New Albany City Council has accomplished many things in the last few years.

It was able to create a cabaret ordinance keeping the residents of New Albany safe from the Rustic Frog. It was able to pass a novelty lighter ordinance keeping the city safe from impulse purchases at convenience stores. The council also ruled against a zoning board recommendation in order to protect the residents of Lafayette Drive from Frostys and junior bacon cheeseburgers.

Having introduced himself last week, new Tribune columnist Matt Nash wastes no time in taking our City Council to task for their ongoing efforts to protect themselves at the expense of a properly performing republic. His exgesis on the effects of unfair voting districts is incisive, showing how real world harm is done by the Council's chicanery, with some peoples' votes counting much more than others.

A federal case, to be sure. Thanks, Matt.

Reminder: Public hearing and council meeting to kill two-way street conversion.

A public hearing and special council meeting to vote on the appropriation of $2 million in EDIT funds for paving has been announced for Thursday, May 28. The hearing will be at 7:15 pm and the meeting at 7:30 pm in the usual third floor Assembly Room location.

It should be noted that much of the chicanery around potential paving has occurred as a matter of jihad against the proposed two-way street conversions with the conversation sometimes veering in a very personal direction, with objections based on where the conversions would take place rather than how.

The fact that a special, largely unadvertised meeting was scheduled to kill a widely popular proposal is unfortunately not surprising.

Those interested in two-way, traffic calmed, pedestrian and bike friendly streets might want to consider raising their voices.

More than twenty years after middle school, it still doesn't add up.

Some random thoughts and observances on the last of the Resources for Results public hearings at Highland Hills:

* While some individual members of the committee may very well be interested in public input, anyone who believes the school system is genuinely concerned about it might have their own desk at the school. The presentation was lousy, with attendees unable to make heads or tails of information glossed over in literally five minutes. There wasn't even time to read it quickly while the system's man talked over top of it.

* If the maximum time spans allotted to public input during the entire three-year Resources process are added together, they amount to about seven and a half hours.

* I'll again point out that the school system made no effort to distribute data or any other information to the public prior to any of the meetings. Apparently, the average citizen is supposed to be able to absorb three years worth of study, analyze it, and develop cogent, three minute public arguments about it in the one minute interim between the aforementioned useless presentation and the public speaking portion of the hearing. Either that, or the school system is betting on the fact that such a restrictive scenario will keep them from it. I'm betting on the latter. It was insulting enough that the school system's printed warnings against the use of profanity became quickly relevant.

* According to Kathy Ayres, the enrollment numbers presented on slide 8 of the school system's show don't match the enrollment numbers provided by either the state's Department of Education or the school system's capital projects list. There are discrepancies as large as 275 students.

* A Silver Street teacher pointed out that, if one does the math, the magic 300 enrollment number used as a cut off by the school system for it's ciphering does not actually reflect optimum class size. It should be lower.

* If my sources are correct, only one "hill" parent spoke during any of the three hearings and no one spoke in favor of closing schools. If public input is given as much weight as the school system claims it is, neither the committee nor Dr. Brooks has sufficient impetus to close a school.

* Walking into Highland Hills Middle School for the first time, I immediately realized why parents who spend any time there would think our tax dollars are being wasted. If we can afford to build that, there's no justifiable reason to be talking about closing schools.

What I said in my three minutes, before the last paragraph was cut off by the school system's director of communication, whose title is an obvious misnomer:

I know the Resources for Results Committee has put in a tremendous amount of time examining the questions put before it, even if public and other outside input has been severely limited. As a result, I’m not here tonight as a city resident to rehash the many solid arguments already put forth by my peers concerning the benefits of walkable, neighborhood schools and their positive impact on urban communities. I know the committee has heard them and trust that they, as stewards of our common future, will take them seriously enough to grant them the further exploration and discussion they deserve as they consider their recommendations.

I am here tonight, though, to show solidarity with those county residents whose rural lifestyles are being taken from them. As many of us in the city have worked tirelessly to inject new life, investment, and increased residency into our neighborhoods - only to end up feeling threatened by lack of acknowledgment from the school system and closed-door discussions - I realize that same pattern has been repeated in outlying areas – only in reverse.

There is a growing movement in outlying areas of Floyd County to protect the rural lifestyle that attracted many residents to them in the first place. As residents have become more active in pursuing limits to unchecked growth and the fiscal and environmental damage it causes, county government has responded with a master plan designed to guide and control it. Such actions are essential to maintaining both the character and sustainability of the area and provide a good example of what can happen when citizens and governmental institutions cooperate.

Unfortunately, those good works in the city and county have yet to be reflected in school system policy. While city residents and government attempt to increase growth in the city by investing in infrastructure improvements, business development, and urban amenities, the school system has focused its investments in outlying areas, hampering those efforts. At the same time, while county residents and government seek to reign in massive developments and set land use standards, the school system has thrown open the gates by favoring the expansion of rural schools, even going so far as to overbuild past their own demographic projections, encouraging the further suburbanization of the Knobs.

In both cases, our tax dollars are being pitted against each other, being used to pursue conflicting outcomes. That can’t possibly be the most efficient use of resources.

The good news is that those city and county residents share common goals—more development in the urban city and less in the rural county. We’re on the same train. Moreover, national demographic trends suggest that we’re on the right track. The millennial generation who’s coming of age now is showing great propensity for reversing the outward migration trends of recent decades, preferring instead to return to more densely populated urban areas to live and raise families. It’s that generation- not their parents - whose children will determine our school system’s needs for the next few decades.

With Dr. Brooks’ departure imminent, I would encourage the committee to join in that spirit of cooperation, to get on that train, and explore some tracks that may not have been presented you as of yet in preparation for new leadership. We should be planning based on who and where we want to be twenty or thirty years from now rather than just what you’re stuck with this summer.

New Urbanism vs. Resources for Pre-Determined Results vs. elevated liver counts.

It was my intention to attend tonight’s last of three public hearings at Highland Hills Middle School on the topic of Resources for (Pre-Determined) Results.

Really, it was, but after a day spent dealing with business/work on one side and a roof being placed atop our house on the other, I couldn’t get my butt off the couch and into the car. I feel bad about it. Sorry. It isn’t because I don’t care. It’s just an inordinately stressful time on the job, and from the outset, the school corporation’s “resources” charade has left me cold, angry and feeling too much like I’ve seen this movie before and didn't enjoy it then, either.

In fact, ever since Resources for Results bubbled to the service, and the school corporation shifted into damage control mode as part of a vapid spin cycle as incompetently rendered as any we’ve seen of late, I’ve been thinking that there's something about this cover committee farce annoyingly redolent of past city vs. county game-playing, even if I can’t put my finger on it.

Populism usually isn’t my bag, but I’ll vent, anyway.

It’s very frustrating to me to contemplate the extent to which so many earnest, harried neighborhood activists – most of them hanging by their proverbial fingernails to various tiny bits of hope that they can somehow reverse 30 years of institutionalized idiocy, turn the situation around, and make the urban core viable again – must watch as their efforts are effectively sabotaged by the further impending loss of neighborhood schools at the behest of a school corporation that seems to believe it educates in a vacuum.

Granted, I don't have children, and some of these hard working activists don't, either, and yet I feel bad for them and worse for the families watching helplessly as the rug gets pulled out from under their struggles. This has been even sadder owing to the artlessness of the school system's proceedings.

While I’m at it, if anyone spots a scintilla of evidence that the current elected school board has contributed an ounce of leadership to the “resources” sham, please let me know. I'll eat my hat. If just one of them publicly confessed to the resources committee being a staged, rigged joke, perhaps that's something we might build from to begin a genuine dialogue. Like New Albany in general, the only ones we hear from are the ones least able to contribute to the solution. Is it in the water?

Yes, this is one of the weakest pieces I've written in a while. I feel bad about that, too, and it quite possibly will offend someone. I'm dog tired, my blood alcohol is way too low, and the hypocrisy level is cresting above my ability to be coherent. As I wrote previously, I have friends in the school corporation's upper echelons. By now I thought that at least one or two of them might have tried to respond with a counter argument. Regrettably, there has been nothing except the sounds of silence. That bothers me. Maybe I'm not living right. Maybe they're feeling guilty. Maybe both.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to be fitted for my British Redcoat uniform in preparation for attending tomorrow's tea party. After all, I'm no populist.

Goebbels said it best.

Or perhaps it was Goering.

No matter the source, it remains the case that the bigger and more breathtaking the lie, the more likely gullible folks are to believe it. Locally, no one fabricates them better than the 1st district’s Dan “Wizard of Westside” Coffey, who dispensed his favorite tall tale to the Tribune’s reporter in an article today about the city budget.

Coffey proposes using money owed to the city’s Economic Development Income Tax fund from the State Street parking garage tax-increment financing district, to float a bond for paying for officers.

The old “pay back the $3 million” line should be enshrined on the Urban Legends web site alongside the Protocols of the Elders of Zion. My colleague Jeff rebutted it only recently in the comments section of another blog, after which the pins could be heard dropping.

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The bond for the parking garage was initially approved by the Council so that it would be paid by both EDIT and TIF, with a majority coming from EDIT.

As stated in the notes, the bank didn't finish the top floors of its building as soon as expected. That means not as much TIF was collected as expected in the earliest years of the bond, hence the $256K shortfall mentioned.

The Council was asked to appropriate additional EDIT to cover that shortfall and the lease rental reserve. That total, according to the notes, was $580K.

The rest of the $3.6 million had already been allocated to the garage in the original bond agreement. It was neither extra nor a loan. Only the $580K was additional. The $3,696,350 mentioned was the total amount of EDIT spent on the garage including both the $3 million already pledged by the council and the additional $580K to be requested.

You'll also note that Mr. Malaysz suggested that the money ($580K) COULD be paid back. Just because he mentioned it in a Redevelopment meeting DOES NOT mean that the Council voted to set it up that way. The notes posted mean only that it was discussed as a possibility outside of a Council meeting.

When Dan Coffey brought a bogus resolution forward to pay more than $3 million from TIF to EDIT last year based on this rumor instead of actually doing his homework (he never even requested information about the garage bond), Mr. Rosenbarger offered to provide Coffey and the entire Council with the original bond documentation showing his error. Coffey, of course, refused.

Since that time, the long disproven rumor of a $3 million loan has continued to circulate, usually from anonymous sources who, like Coffey, are more interested in political turmoil than the truth.

Note also that the same anonymous gripes continue to claim on your blog, as did Coffey at the time, that our tax dollars subsidize the operation of the parking garage.

Their own notes here prove them wrong, showing that the garage actually turns a small profit each year. They'll no doubt purposely forget that and go back to griping about subsidizing garage operations soon.

In short, why doesn't TIF pay back $3 million to EDIT? Because it doesn't owe EDIT $3 million and never did.

Besides, EDIT money can be spent on anything that TIF can be used to finance. What's the point of continuing to demand the false repayment if the money can be spent on the important projects you mention anyway?