If Klein Homes intends to remove the pedestrian walkway at Serenity Springs, perhaps the web site needs to be updated.

It has long been my contention that the persistent illegality of vandalism forces certain personality types into property development, and once there, seated atop their fleets of bulldozers, they deploy a random palaver generator to name their forthcoming scars on the landscape.

For instance, if it's to be called Towering Oak estates, you can be sure of only one thing: There are no oak trees, as they all were removed to make way for the houses.

Seriously ... Serenity Springs. If you didn't already know, you'd think it's a funeral home, wouldn't you?

At any rate, the property developers making like the Romans at Carthage (look it up, Lawyer Daggett) in this instance seem unwilling to install their walking path.

But why not? They're only emulating municipal government.

Great moments in (non?) ordinance enforcement: The Elm Street Coke Machine.

Let's kick off Monday morning with a look at just one example of New Albany's chief persistent failing, ordinance enforcement.

An NAC reader asks, "Didn't the Board of Works rule that the Coke machine at 610 E. Market had to be removed?

For photos and the original story, go here: Coke machines and condoms: Let's all vend.

Yes, the board did vote in favor of removal. The vote came at the June 30 meeting, as described below in the meeting minutes. If there has been any updates, they are not available, as no minutes have been posted on-line since July.

A MEETING OF THE BOARD OF PUBLIC WORKS & SAFETY OF THE CIVIL CITY OF NEW ALBANY, INDIANA, WILL BE HELD IN THE THIRD FLOOR ASSEMBLY ROOM AT THE CITY/COUNTY BUILDING ON TUESDAY, JUNE 30, 2009 AT 10:00 A.M.

PRESENT: Matt Denison, Suellen Wilkinson, Kay Garry, Corporal Mike Lawrence, Dennis Smith Traffic Department, Code Enforcement Officer Tim Teives, Deputy Clerk Marcey Wisman, David Hall, Animal Control, Tim Marinaro, City Engineer

CALL TO ORDER:

Mr. Denison called the meeting to order at 10:02 a.m.

PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE:

NEW BUSINESS:

Item #1 - Matt Denison re: Vending Machine in front of 610 E Elm Street

Mr. Denison stated that Shane McCain is the owner of this property and the complaints have come from several different sources throughout the community. He explained that they vending machine is in a City right-of-way and that Mr. McCain has never been before the board to request permission to put the machine on the property which is what policy requires. He stated they have tried to contact Mr. McCain and sent him a letter requesting his presence at the meeting today but did not get any response. He explained that Mr. Wood said that they have come across some issues but nothing to make them take action and he asked the boards opinion on what action they should take at this time.

Mr. Teives stated that this started with residents complaining about the aesthetics and the fact that this is in a residential area and he explained that the property owners are not residents of New Albany.

Mrs. Wilkinson moved to remove the machine from the City right-of-way, Mrs. Garry second, all voted in favor.

Mr. Denison stated that he would draft a letter and with the approval of Mr. Gibson would send a certified copy to Mr. McCain giving him notice that the city will be removing the machine.

Coke machines and condoms: Let's all vend.

I've been thinking about putting a condom machine in front of my house, with the proceeds not going toward maintaining my slumlord property.

Nice sheet of plywood upstairs for the past three or so years. Was there a window before? Very high standards overall, and caffeine at all hours.

Okay, okay ... I don't own a slumlord property, but I've always been curious as to the standards for matters like this. If it's legal to have a Coke machine in front of my house, then I'm not joking about the condoms.