Yet again gripped with nostalgia, we remember Gahan's hilarious Great Street Piano Meltdown of 2015.

You'll recall the Board of Public Works and Safety as an entity twisted these past eight years to primarily administer Jeff Gahan's political patronage network. Today is the fourth anniversary of the bored's idiotically delayed decision to allow the existence of a street piano downtown.

The belated dedication ceremony for the street piano that produced so much labored consternation in the Down Low Bunker took place on September 5, 2015.

Shouldn't Street Piano Day be a civic holiday? Just swipe your card to help the veneer king serve as mayor for life and YOU can play, too.

The following was originally published in 2016. Spoiler alert: In the three years since, Gahan's megalomania has only gotten worse.

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An omen is an event regarded as a portent of good or evil, and sometimes both.

This morning it dawned on me that I have failed to receive the weekly e-mail agenda of the Board of Public Works and Safety's Tuesday meeting.

No doubt this is a providential omen, freeing me from the crushing burden of observing the bureaucracy of local infrastructure, and suggesting that I make better different use of my time this morning.

Keep the questions coming. Meanwhile, let's take a fond look back to last year, and the Bored's bumbling performance in the legendary case of the New Albany Street Piano.

The following three posts include most of the other links to this most enduring and hilarious of stories.

As a refresher, here is Bluegill's summary.

First, there was a request to place a piano on a public sidewalk in New Albany; a fun, harmless, and completely normal happening around the world. Then there were months of city officials sidestepping and ignoring that request. Then there were additional weeks and multiple meetings of artificially constructed and wholly irrelevant hurdles put in place. Then there was media attention and, by New Albany standards, an expression of public support for the piano and exasperation with the City sizable enough to embarrass the officials involved. And then there was finally approval, with an almost equally embarrassing rearguard attempt to claim officials had supported it all along. I wish any of that was out of the ordinary but it's a near perfect example of what ordinary is here, even and especially when the stakes are much higher. Playing a new tune couldn't be any more welcome.

And the links ...

Bored of Works no more: Today at 4:00 p.m., the New Albany Street Piano becomes a reality.

Fundamentally delayed: The New Albany Street Piano "Grand Opening" is Saturday, September 5.

Celebrate the New Albany Street Piano, while remembering Team Gahan's dismal reaction to it.

ASK THE BORED: Gripped with nostalgia, we remember the Great Street Piano Meltdown of 2015.

Came the reminder: two years ago today was the belated (to put it mildly) dedication ceremony for the street piano that produced so much labored consternation in the Down Low Bunker.

This post from July 26, 2016 explains what happened.

Shouldn't Street Piano Day be a civic holiday?

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An omen is an event regarded as a portent of good or evil, and sometimes both.

This morning it dawned on me that I have failed to receive the weekly e-mail agenda of the Board of Public Works and Safety's Tuesday meeting.

No doubt this is a providential omen, freeing me from the crushing burden of observing the bureaucracy of local infrastructure, and suggesting that I make better different use of my time this morning.

Keep the questions coming. Meanwhile, let's take a fond look back to last year, and the Bored's bumbling performance in the legendary case of the New Albany Street Piano.

The following three posts include most of the other links to this most enduring and hilarious of stories.

As a refresher, here is Bluegill's summary.

First, there was a request to place a piano on a public sidewalk in New Albany; a fun, harmless, and completely normal happening around the world. Then there were months of city officials sidestepping and ignoring that request. Then there were additional weeks and multiple meetings of artificially constructed and wholly irrelevant hurdles put in place. Then there was media attention and, by New Albany standards, an expression of public support for the piano and exasperation with the City sizable enough to embarrass the officials involved. And then there was finally approval, with an almost equally embarrassing rearguard attempt to claim officials had supported it all along. I wish any of that was out of the ordinary but it's a near perfect example of what ordinary is here, even and especially when the stakes are much higher. Playing a new tune couldn't be any more welcome.

And the links ...

Bored of Works no more: Today at 4:00 p.m., the New Albany Street Piano becomes a reality.

Fundamentally delayed: The New Albany Street Piano "Grand Opening" is Saturday, September 5.

Celebrate the New Albany Street Piano, while remembering Team Gahan's dismal reaction to it.

ASK THE BORED: A 6-pack of BOW's top-scoring posts of the year at NA Confidential, as we try our best to forget them.

Of all posts this year tagged "Board of Public Works and Safety" or "Board of Public Works," these are the top six, according to Blogger's page view metric.

At its most basic, this board channels public financing of works. The chairman is Warren Nash, former Democratic Party tribal chieftain, who is there only because six decades of experience greasing wheels ensures that no campaign finance slush goes unslung. The abacus fairly sweats, and the rubber always meets the freshly paved road.

(The other two board members are Mickey Thompson, the street department commissioner, and Cheryl Cotner-Bailey, the mayor’s secretary and wife of the police chief.)

As for safety, yes, the word is mentioned every now and then, about as often as I concede to savoring the full, rich flavor of Bud Light.

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590
No decision has been reached on new Street Piano Project, says Board of Works and Public Safety.

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606
ASK THE BORED: Can we all have a banner atop the levee, or just the school corporation?

I've had several reader questions about the NAFC schools banner currently hanging on degraded remains of the structure atop the levee by the amphitheater. Because I'll be out of town, I cannot attend this week's BOW meeting and ask them. Perhaps someone else will.

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613
I asked about bicycle racks, and have been directed to CM Barksdale and the Redevelopment Commission.

"Will the Bored of Works be placing bicycle racks on sidewalks, and if so, will it finalize the bike racks before or after the results come back from HWC Engineering's two-way street design and engineering study?"

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617
ON THE AVENUES: Requiem for the bored.

It was another stellar day for auto-centrism in New Albany, and contrary to previous assurances, not a single egg was broken, Larry – just a random walker struck down, and never mentioned, not once, not by anyone in the room. She was probably too poor to afford a car -- right, Warren?

Tell me something.

Exactly how does any of this make any of you proud of your jobs?

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650
Two Way Streets now? Finally? Gahan sets the bar as low as humanly possible and somehow clears it, as BOW opts for a rational street grid.

In the worst kept secret since the Electoral College sucks, the Board of Works voted today to adopt Option B, which restores two-way traffic to Elm, Spring, Market, Bank and Pearl, though at the considerable and heart-rending expense of gutting most of consultant Jeff Speck's worthiest proposals for bicycling lanes and parking innovations on these and other subsequently omitted streets (State and Vincennes most glaringly).

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670
ON THE AVENUES: When the engineer uttered that scandalous word aloud, it was like Christmas in June.

There’ll be even more delays, snarls and slowdowns when toll evasion begins, even though INDOT predicts these disruptions will be brief (one month or less), and the overarching point everyone at BOW needs to grasp is this revamped section of Spring between Silver Creek and Vincennes is intended to be a check valve, to do exactly this – this process, this choking off … to willfully cause … CONGESTION.

No decision has been reached on new Street Piano Project, says Board of Works and Public Safety.

Photo credit: Art is Fifth Dimension, via MW.

ASK THE BORED: One year ago, the New Albany Street Piano was utterly perplexing Team Gahan's artistic sensibility.

An omen is an event regarded as a portent of good or evil, and sometimes both.

This morning it dawned on me that I have failed to receive the weekly e-mail agenda of the Board of Public Works and Safety's Tuesday meeting.

No doubt this is a providential omen, freeing me from the crushing burden of observing the bureaucracy of local infrastructure, and suggesting that I make better different use of my time this morning.

Keep the questions coming. Meanwhile, let's take a fond look back to last year, and the Bored's bumbling performance in the legendary case of the New Albany Street Piano.

The following three posts include most of the other links to this most enduring and hilarious of stories.

As a refresher, here is Bluegill's summary.

First, there was a request to place a piano on a public sidewalk in New Albany; a fun, harmless, and completely normal happening around the world. Then there were months of city officials sidestepping and ignoring that request. Then there were additional weeks and multiple meetings of artificially constructed and wholly irrelevant hurdles put in place. Then there was media attention and, by New Albany standards, an expression of public support for the piano and exasperation with the City sizable enough to embarrass the officials involved. And then there was finally approval, with an almost equally embarrassing rearguard attempt to claim officials had supported it all along. I wish any of that was out of the ordinary but it's a near perfect example of what ordinary is here, even and especially when the stakes are much higher. Playing a new tune couldn't be any more welcome.

And the links ...

Bored of Works no more: Today at 4:00 p.m., the New Albany Street Piano becomes a reality.

Fundamentally delayed: The New Albany Street Piano "Grand Opening" is Saturday, September 5.

Celebrate the New Albany Street Piano, while remembering Team Gahan's dismal reaction to it.

There's a stealth street piano placement underway. Let's hope Warren and the Boredettes approved it, or things might get wacky.

This being New Albany, it isn't clear whether the piano was purposefully placed at this corner, or merely dumped from a passing pickup.

Let's hope Warren and the Boredettes have approved these repurposed news racks, lest we endure the sequel to Street Piano Interruptus (2015 Remix).

Let's hope Warren and the Boredettes have approved these repurposed news racks, lest we endure the sequel to Street Piano Interruptus (2015 Remix).

Photo credit: First linked article below.

From 2015, a fuller explanation of the project from the newspaper, via the Indiana Economic Digest.

Repurposed newspaper racks to transform into Little Free Libraries

The News and Tribune, the Arts Council of Southern Indiana and naming sponsor Schmitt Furniture are launching an initiative to repurpose newspaper distribution boxes into Little Free Library locations that will be placed throughout neighborhoods and downtowns in Clark and Floyd counties.

From earlier in the week, the Arts Council's update at Fb.

Schmitt Furniture News Rack Little Free Library Project

Thank you to Sierra Wiese! To those without the pleasure of knowing her, she is a member of the Community Foundation of Southern Indiana, Youth Philanthropy Council and Student Council President of Jeffersonville High School, who delivered 600 books for our Schmitt Furniture News Rack Little Free Library Project!

After a brief scare, the New Albany Street Piano returns to non-ideological musical duty.

Today:

Wednesday:

Hannegan has asked that we all respect the piano's position above politics.

Let's close with a musical number!

Bored of Works no more: Today at 4:00 p.m., the New Albany Street Piano becomes a reality.

We've been waiting for a piano like this (among other things), and so let's celebrate the advent of the New Albany Street Piano with music.

Everyone knows that the entire process was far more excruciating and bureaucracy-laden than it should have been, and so I've been taking notes for The Resistance.

But there'll be no coaxing and imploring, at least not from this quarter. Some folks just have to dope it out on their own.

Read more here: Fundamentally delayed: The New Albany Street Piano "Grand Opening" is Saturday, September 5.

I'll be downtown for the installation. If you'd like a Baylor for Mayor yard sign, I'll even bring the car so we have access to the trunk.

Fundamentally delayed: The New Albany Street Piano "Grand Opening" is Saturday, September 5.

The New Albany Street Piano "Grand Opening" will take place at 4:00 p.m. on Saturday, September 5, and it is likely to be the politician-watching event of the millennium.

That's because:

Make no mistake: Jeff Gahan is the "driving force" behind the Bored of Works' inability to fathom street pianos, public art and modernity itself.

The street piano was quarantined for months by the mayor's insatiable need for down-low control, and when this fact became painfully obvious to the entire community (except Jimmy, of course), Team Gahan got hot and bothered.

GAHANS STRIKE BACK: Street piano approved but the social media fur begins to fly.

Now that something so very simple finally has been blessed by the self-appointed pillars, how many of them will turn out to claim credit for a phenomenon they neither understood nor assisted?

Celebrate the New Albany Street Piano, while remembering Team Gahan's dismal reaction to it.

I'll be there with a clipboard, checking off the hypocrisy.

Saturday, September 5
4:00 p.m.
Jimmy's Music Center, 123 E. Market St., New Albany

Mark your calendars! After all of the hullabaloo of the last few months, it is finally time to enjoy the New Albany Street Piano for its original purpose: making music and spreading joy to downtown New Albany. We hope to have a good crowd assembled for the unveiling, so please share this invite and bring a friend of two. We invite you all to stop by Jimmy's to see the piano and play/sing/listen for a bit, then head to enjoy an evening at one of the many fine establishments the downtown has to offer. Hope to see you there!

Celebrate the New Albany Street Piano, while remembering Team Gahan's dismal reaction to it.

It is fitting and proper for Hannegan to say what she does in the commentary linked below, in which she applauds the playing of a new tune.

Consider also this summary, posted last week by NAC's Jeff Gillenwater.

First, there was a request to place a piano on a public sidewalk in New Albany; a fun, harmless, and completely normal happening around the world. Then there were months of city officials sidestepping and ignoring that request. Then there were additional weeks and multiple meetings of artificially constructed and wholly irrelevant hurdles put in place. Then there was media attention and, by New Albany standards, an expression of public support for the piano and exasperation with the City sizable enough to embarrass the officials involved. And then there was finally approval, with an almost equally embarrassing rearguard attempt to claim officials had supported it all along. I wish any of that was out of the ordinary but it's a near perfect example of what ordinary is here, even and especially when the stakes are much higher. Playing a new tune couldn't be any more welcome.

As any teacher knows, there's always an important lesson to be learned, and in this instance it must be remembered that in the aftermath of a board of works meeting last week in which the street piano finally was set free, Hannegan Roseberry absorbed a fair share of intemperate social media abuse from Team Gahan.

This is very unfair, and someone needs to say it aloud. It might as well be me.

Hannegan didn’t know about the "free the piano" Facebook page, because I did it on my own without asking her, secure in the knowledge that my sub-par “photoshopping” skills immediately would identify it as mine – to my anonymous Twitter parodist (why is a masked Rogar acceptable if my signed satire is not?), if to no one else.

Furthermore, Hannegan also didn’t know about Michael Wimmer’s protest piano project. In fact, I believe they only met for the first time as she walked past on her way to the meeting.

So, in short: If any of you wish to “bully” someone, my advice is to leave her out of it and come straight to the source of your displeasure: Me.

Why?

Because I’m the thorn in your paw.

I’m the one exposing your chicanery and detailing your errors.

I’m the one creating serious doubts in the minds of the voters ... one at a time, little by little.

I’m the occupant of your anxiety closet, instigating your existential crisis, and keeping those Tums shareholders happy.

I’m the one throwing my head back and laughing, because I'm old enough to remember Democrats like Hubert Humphrey, "The Happy Warrior."

Let's be blunt: Your wounds are self-inflicted. It didn't need to be this way. You did it to yourselves, and in the end, it's all good, because there'll be an election in November.

Team Gahan will seek to buy it by flashing photos of a pool on TIF plastic, payable by our grandchildren, as the self-interested cadres pretend to be democratic, (lower case) and masquerade as Democrats (upper case).

The Republican will counter by saying, "I'm not Gahan," offering as an alternative our county government's chronic austerity and disinvestment.

The remainder of us will get to work building something tangible, absent the Kool-Aid spiked with Walt Disney.

Kudos to Hannegan for her perseverance. Let's just not forget who put her through this ridicuously unnecessary wringer: Team Gahan.

Newly dubbed: Celebrate the New Albany Street Piano.

ROSEBERRY: Time to play a new tune: Let's shift the narrative on the New Albany street piano, by Hannegan Roseberry (News and Tribune)

More than three months ago, I approached the New Albany Board of Works with the idea of installing a street piano. Little did I know, Pandora’s Box of political jockeying was about to be opened.

The goal of this project was to spread music and joy, not to ignite a firestorm surrounding City Hall. Over the past four months, I have inadvertently served as whipping post/pied piper/musical Robin Hood for quirky arts in New Albany. I’ve made some people unhappy with me by chronicling my experience, and I’ve made others very excited that this fun project is coming to fruition.

Broken Sidewalk dissects City Hall's tone deafness in the "Street Piano Debacle of 2015."

Broken Sidewalk collates the facts from multiple sources and presents an excellent overview of the Street Piano Debacle of 2015.

Please don’t injure yourself playing this artistic piano on New Albany’s downtown sidewalks, by Branden Klayko (Broken Sidewalk)

 ... New Albany’s off-tune reception of Roseberry’s street piano highlights a critical part of urban life today—that we must embrace experimentation in our public realm. As cities and urban areas continue to draw more residents and visitors, the community is eager to explore new ways of interacting with the city—and with each other. Whether it’s through tactical urbanism, public art, or simply just hanging out on the sidewalk, cities like New Albany would do well to encourage such citizen-led initiatives and reap the benefits of a revitalized urban society.

GAHANS STRIKE BACK: Street piano approved but the social media fur begins to fly.

I predicted this one. First, Hannegan thanks her supporters.

And then this.

There isn't much else to say about this WATCH OUT FOR THAT FRYING PAN!

The News and Tribune story is here.

Part One of "Free the Street Piano," in which there is a subtle public protest outside.

With Hannegan Rosebarry's street piano returning yet again to the Board of Public Works and Safety agenda on Tuesday morning, artist Michael Wimmer conceived a public art protest of the public art captivity, and created his own street piano out of scrap materials.

As you can see from the photo above, when I arrived on the scene at 9:30 a.m., Michael's piano was in place on the plaza in front of the City-County building's front entrance. The News and Tribune's photographer was snapping shots.

David Duggins emerged from the front entrance. The city's corporate welfare bursar walked toward us, said hello to everyone except me, continued walking on the sidewalk, and made a loop to the building's Spring Street entrance.

Moments later, out came the building authority's head supervisor, who informed Michael that if he wanted the piano to remain on the public plaza, as opposed to the public sidewalk ten feet away, he'd have to obtain -- wait for it -- the Board of Public Works and Safety's approval.

Not wanting to subject himself to a six-week rejection process, Michael rolled the piano to the sidewalk, then after a few minutes, he repositioned it on the south side of the plaza-sidewalk intersection. It was at this point that I  glanced toward the entrance to the sheriff's department and saw a hologram. ‬

The mayor spotted me leveling a camera in his direction, and by the time I squeezed the shutter, all I saw was his back.

Michael stayed streetside with his creation when the meeting started at 10:00 a.m., and he said that he'd be wheeling "Free the Street Piano" around during the next few days. It's intended to be inter-active, so you can sign it and leave comments. Here's a good one: "Regime Change Now."

Part two is here.

Part Two of "Free the Street Piano," as the Bored finally releases the hostage.

Part One is here.

I'm not sure where to begin in documenting the rampantly officious hypocrisy that has come to epitomize New Albany's Board of Public Works and Safety, but let's give it a try for posterity's sake.

Since first approached by Hannegan Roseberry with a request to place an artistically adorned street piano under the awning at Jimmy's Music Center on the corner of Pearl and Market, the board has gone out of its way to be unresponsive.

It tabled Hannegan's request, then obscurely deflected responsibility first to an utterly befuddled Historical Preservation commission, then to an equally baffled Develop New Albany, before finally -- weeks later -- concluding that major liability issues precluded approval. These issues were explained in mind-numbing detail this morning by the city's "corporate" attorney, Shane Gibson, who didn't bother summarizing why they don't matter for various trip hazards on city sidewalks ... but I digress.

In short, it has been as though this board, handpicked by Mayor Jeff Gahan, has contrived to distill fifty years of underachieving, caterwauling, Luddite, top-down, ward-heeling insensitivity to modernity into one entirely unintentional crowning condemnation of New Albany's political monetization "culture."

In short, the Board of Works has sent up itself -- parodied itself, made itself a laughingstock, tittered at the artsy-fartsy, donned the emperor Gahan's brilliant new clothes, mimicked the movie Footloose, an embarrassed an entire city.

Today, having at last reassured itself that Jimmy Gaetano actually was on board with the idea of the piano sitting by his building, near the "Gahan for Mayor" sign in his window, which provides the single gut-funniest commentary in this entire theater of the absurd (naturally, any of the board's members might have phoned Gaetano moments after the first request was made, but no), Hannegan's request was approved unanimously.

Before you could extract a cash-stuffed envelope from a far-off Democratic Party PAC, the same city officials who have laboriously compiled a weeks-long record of pettiness on the Street Piano rushed to glad-hand Hannegan.

They have not read George Orwell, and they feel no shame. You can be sure they'll now claim credit for what they did so much to impede.

Can anyone explain why this happened?

What new line of defense will be contrived by the Bored of Works to contain the street piano contagion?

Here's the view from the Bored Room:

New Albany: Wonderfully and delightfully us ... so visit Free the New Albany Street Piano at Facebook and join the fun, because we're not laughing WITH them.

Anyone seen the mayor?

The Street Piano returns for its 4th (5th? 16th?) gala appearance Tuesday at the Bored of Works.

Heck, we were under the impression that that mayor finally had emitted coded signals from the down-low bunker and resolved the impasse by the usual methods.

Mayor Gahan announces compromise street piano measure.

Mayor Gahan announces compromise street piano measure.

Undoubtedly with plaque to follow.

Street Piano remains silent, though City Hall's cluelessness nears a crescendo.

Street Piano remains silent, though City Hall's cluelessness nears a crescendo.

The saga continues, and the non-communicators remains silent.

At last glance, the Free the New Albany Street Piano community at Fb had garnered 233 like in a little over a day. Sample comments:

• We should stage a piano sit in- New Albany mayor should be embarrassed- aren't we voting for new leadership soon?
• Come on! Let go just for once!
• We should encourage not discourage any opportunity to bring art, creativity and music to our citizens. How could this possibly harm anybody?

At the News and Tribune, Hannegan Roseberry concedes to exasperation. I feel badly for her, and also for all those who value art, music, creativity, and thinking outside self-imposed boxes. However, New Albany's Street Piano is performing a valuable public service.

It's showing us just how tone deaf the Gahan administration is -- and not just about a painted piano.

Oops, she did it again

• Why is the idea of a street piano so abhorrent to our officials?
• Why, when I followed the correct procedure back in April, was I completely shut down by a tangled web of emails and miscommunication (which I chronicled in a News and Tribune column at that point)?
• Why was I then encouraged to proceed again, and do it the "right way," why was I then put through a series of public hoops and hurdles over the last two weeks?
• Why is the Board of Works working so very, very hard to think of any— ANY — reason to shut this (me?) down, dragging Historic Landmarks and Develop New Albany into the fray (my apologies to both entities)?
• Why are citizens not allowed to have individual ideas? Why does everything have to come from above in our city?
• Finally, why is Jeffersonville so ready and willing to consider art in unexpected ways and why are we so terrified to do the same here in New Albany?

Photo essay: Only one of these things is a liability concern for the Board of Public Works and Safety.

Neither this trip hazard on 10th and Elm ...

... nor this one on the opposite corner.

Not this semi truck invading sidewalk space.

No, not the underbrush obscuring this sign (and intersection).

Faded bike lane markings by an interstate-grade one-way street? Nope.

Cars parking on the sidewalk? Not even close.

You guessed it: The board's big liability concern
is a street piano/public art project. 

(Unfortunately, this is not The Onion, and we're not joking)