Dear Bill Hanson: Put down that colander, give NA some equality, or just change the damn name back to Evening News.

Last week:

154 days since we had a News and Tribune reporter in New Albany, but look: Cooking School! In Jeffersonville!

Make that 163 days.

It's quite possible that the length of last evening's meeting prevented the News and Tribune's reporter of record from filing the story to meet deadline.

But exactly who was the newspaper's reporter last evening?

Analysis: Gahan and the rental ordinance, or the emasculation of the once-powerful Oz.

Neither Jerod Clapp nor Chris Morris was in attendance. A few tweets sneaked into the newspaper's primary Twitter feed, and it finally occurred to me that Jenna Esarey, a local free-lancer, likely was providing coverage.

Let's reprise: The News and Tribune was down a city beat reporter throughout the conclusion of the 2015 New Albany election cycle.

There hasn't been a New Albany-centric columnist since Matt Nash left to run for council.

On most days, the ratio of Clark-to-Floyd articles is 60% -- and I'm likely being charitable.

Recently, every ounce of the newspaper's vigor seems devoted to touting its self-aggrandizing cooking school in Jeffersonville (how very ... something), even as ...

Chef Gina Brown offers all-ages friendly cooking class (Insider Louisville)

... in New Albany.

Finally, when it came to one of the most important city council meetings of the year, who was out there digging out the rental property ordinance for all (pro or con) to see, pointing to the mayor's unprecedented statement yesterday, and live tweeting the meeting last night?

That's right: NA Confidential, a mere pro bono blog.

I'm not tooting my own trumpet, just spewing a few facts. This situation has long since become an embarrassment.

Is Bill Hanson still publisher? Why not level with us, Bill? Are you beholden to directives from 'Bama? Waiting for the journalism schools to disgorge a few freshly graduated (read: acceptably salaried) newbies? None of the above?

The newspaper is quick to let us know when it receives an award. Unfortunately, the current prize is a Golden Raspberry -- and the newspaper is the proud recipient.

If you can't do any better than this, then please just change the name back to Jeffersonville Evening News -- you know, fair advertising and all that.

154 days since we had a News and Tribune reporter in New Albany, but look: Cooking School! In Jeffersonville!

The web site has lots of information about how to buy things.

How do I buy tickets to a Taste of Home Cooking School show?

Each Taste of Home Cooking School show is locally managed by a media partner. Click HERE to be directed to our “Find a Show” page on the Taste of Home website, where our local media partners provide instructions on how to purchase tickets.

And: it's at a church.

I wonder when we'll have a reporter again? You know, that news thing.

Flashbacks in the Annals of NA Dysfunction: BOW and City Hall ignore speeding on Elm Street.

In this jam-packed update from a long time ago, we see that so very much has changed.

Uh huh.

---

October 27, 2013: Freshly paraphrased newspaper highlights, including speeding (by design) on Elm Street and a Dutch Treat for the city.

Over yonder, behind Bill Hanson's graffiti-covered 'Bamabuilt paywall, there's an angry letter to the Jeffersonville-based editor from Grace Transue, who takes the New Albany Board of Public Works and Safety quite sternly to task for blithely ignoring persistent complaints about reckless driving and speeding on the city's one-way Elm Street racing corridor between the Interstate 64 ramp and Vincennes Street.

She makes pointed note of her perception of the board's cavalier attitude and dismissive body language, which actually serves to direct us to several fundamental truths in what SHOULD be a two-way discussion:

• A street designed for speeding will (duh) duly produce speeders
• The Board of Works apparently needs weekly exposure to informative weekly recitations highlighting bold new trends in urban modernity, ones mostly dating back to the city's founding
• The Board need not await unnecessary traffic studies to just do something about one-way streets designed for reckless and unsafe driving -- as previous boards have been asked to do for ten years running, or longer
• City Hall continues to gaze numbly upon this and other pressing aspects of the two-way street discussion with an expression resembling that of the proverbial wayward deer in the headlights of an Elm Street driver
• The police department's thoughts on speeding enforcement are, shall we say, cursory

We turn to a more detailed, non-metered source on the police department's recent (and brief) Elm Street observations, as Randy "The Bookseller" Smith explains all at The NewAlbanist:

“Move Along, Nothing to See Here”

In response to a request by a resident of Elm Street (you know who you are), Maj. Keith Whitlow offered up a report to the Board of Public Works and Safety at their regular Tuesday meeting.

As most anyone can tell you, and as everyone who lives on Elm Street can tell you, speeding is a chronic problem there, especially on its one-way stretch from I-64 to Vincennes Street.

In what was reported as a “shift” by Community Newspaper Holdings, Inc. of Montgomery, Ala., a police officer observed the traffic flow on Elm Street, presumably to ascertain whether there was, indeed, a problem with speeding.

On a street where the speed limit is generally 30 mph, and is highly trafficked at all hours, Maj. Whitlow says his assigned officer observed … 45 cars. (read the rest of the story)

Thank you, Randy.

---

In other news, it has been revealed that amid a budget crisis of their own making, Floyd County's bumbling governmental officials haven't yet appropriated the county's annual share of the Scribner Place YMCA payment. In fact, the city of New Albany has paid both its $137K bill AND picked up the tab for the county's $137K balance due.

Remember back when the county approved the yearly Y expenditure even as the city council's Gang of Four still sought to railroad it? We sure do: County backs Scribner Place, Gang of Four scrambling for new excuses (September 14, 2005).

That's right. We've been doing this for a while, haven't we?

At this point, dwelling any further on our county government's breathtaking bankruptcy -- a nadir not so much about cash as a gaping chasm of intellect and leadership -- would merely constitute a tasteless piling-on, so instead, let's consider the unexamined component, namely that the city's annual $137K payment for the Y comprises pretty much the entire expanse of its economic development plan for downtown, apart for periodic dribs and drabs from what's left of the Urban Enterprise Association since it was Norwooded.

Ah, but I have a dream: The city of New Albany spends a few thousand to repair a sidewalk untouched since the Inman Administration BEFORE an entrepreneur agrees to drop a cool million into rehabbing the building sitting behind it, rather than after.

Pro-active? It's a forgotten concept here by sanity's edge.

'Bune says: It's all because of the Y.

A few days ago, the paywall's gate opened, and I was told that a plenary indulgence of five free visits had been granted. Now it has again slammed shut. Perhaps there'll be another spinning of the wheel. Maybe the curtain will be parted, to reveal Bill Hanson removing ad spam for paid on-line subscribers, thus allowing me to make good on my vow of comply, but verify (pop-up demolition).

There's a kind of hush -- all over the world, tonight. Somewhere, a dog barks.

Meanwhile, the newspaper's editor credits the opening of the YMCA five years ago with toppling numerous other dominoes. Do you agree? It's a good piece, and surely the Y provided impetus. What might be missed is the relatively small but symbolically important yearly tithe from both city and county -- an investment in economic development downtown. Almost like a plan. As though there actually is a plan.

Highlights from the hermetic journalism kingdom follow. Maybe you can read the whole essay, and maybe not. Let's all give that pensioner's wheel a mighty heave. Better yet, let's all have a drink.

VAN HOY: Belief in Y’s benefit has paid off, by Shea Van Hoy ('Bama Daydreamin')

— Although the YMCA opened just five years ago, it’s hard to picture downtown New Albany without it. When I took the job as editor of this newspaper in November 2005, there were some people that didn’t want to imagine it at all ...

 ... There have been some hits and some misses, for sure, but here’s a sampling of what’s followed the Y into downtown New Albany:

• A revamped — yet currently underused — riverfront amphitheater.

• A downtown farmers’ market location.

• A new park.

• A winery and a brewpub, and other options to purchase upscale carry-out beer, wine and spirits.

• Restaurants such as Feast BBQ and The Exchange Pub + Kitchen which are getting recognition far beyond New Albany’s borders.

• New French, Italian and Cuban restaurants.

• Trendy boutiques, consignment and gift stores.

• A coffee shop that’s open past lunch time.

• A music venue featuring national acts.

• New Albany outposts of popular Louisville spots Wick’s Pizza, Dragon King’s Daughter, Toast on Market, Quills Coffee and Regalo. All of these businesses chose to open in New Albany rather than another Southern Indiana location.

• Art installations.

• Bike lanes, although more are sorely needed.

I liken these arrivals to dominoes falling, and the YMCA was the one that got the momentum going. These unique restaurants, stores and attractions breed more of the same ...

 ... The downtown New Albany YMCA serves as an example of return on investment for a community and standing up for progress, even when there is resistance. And Friday’s five-year anniversary celebration for the Y is proof that one decision can make a difference in a city’s future.

Hagiography: In quintessence.

A very nice bar, and not high at all. It's the 3rd and Main in Aurora IN

Merely an observation, and no reflection on disagreements (and agreements) now floated downriver; neither of us appears to be going anywhere, and relations have been good. I'm only trying to recall a local elected official in my memory capable of inspiring sheer, pubescent swooning in the manner that Rep. Clere manages. It is a strange and periodically chilling phenomenon, and we've noted past examples in comments sections and letters to the editor. The following dichotomy is perhaps the clearest instance to date.

First, the newspaper's Chris Morris, hardly a neutral figure in such matters, and perennially prone to fawning in proximity to his elders -- except that Morris is chronologically older than Clere. Still, he manages to keep it somewhat in check.

CHEERS

... To Indiana State Rep. Ed Clere, a Republican, who said his party has become a stumbling block to extending health care for low-income Hoosiers.

States were given the option to expand Medicaid coverage under the Affordable Care Act, and Indiana Gov. Mike Pence and Republican leadership decided not to do so. While most elected officials go along with their party leadership on almost every big issue, Clere stood up and called state Republicans out on this important issue.

It shows that he is standing on his own principles and is doing what he thinks is right, instead of rubber-stamping the Republican talking points.

— Chris Morris, Assistant Editor

Fair enough. The dullard Pence and Indiana's GOP leadership have been a disgrace, and I'd taken note of Rep. Clere's comment, too. I hadn't gotten around to doing anything with it, primarily because I wanted to do some further research first, and time has been elusive lately.

Fast forward a week, and then this:

CHEERS

... to the Cheers by Assistant Editor Chris Morris that appeared in the Nov. 2-3 News and Tribune.

We need more politicians like Ed Clere. As a matter of fact, we need more citizens like Ed Clere. As Chris stated, while most elected officials go along with their party leadership on every big issue, Ed stands on his own principles and says and does what he thinks is right. Ed uses common sense when forming and explaining his principles. What a concept. We should all learn from Ed.

I have known Ed for several years. He has always exhibited the finest qualities. First, Ed is always a gentleman, polite and courteous no matter to whom he is speaking; second, he is always fair and ready to discuss any topic, give his opinion and listen to and consider mine; third, he is always willing to volunteer his time for whatever is needed, whether it be to coach a soccer team or sell ears of corn at Harvest Homecoming; fourth, he is everywhere, whether it be at a state event in Indianapolis, a local fundraiser sponsored by philanthropic groups or at our local farmers market shopping for his family; fifth, he is an excellent role model for our youth.

The bottom line is we need more Ed Cleres in this world. So, thanks Ed, for setting the bar so high. Too bad most of us will never reach that level. I am honored to have you as a friend and will never refer to you as a politician.

— Debbie Webb, New Albany

That's just plain weird, and I'd like to add than many of us set the bar quite high -- but never so high that you can't see over it when occupying your favorite bar stool.

Some things go beyond politics, right?

Weekend Update: Freshly paraphrased newspaper highlights, including speeding (by design) on Elm Street and a Dutch Treat for the city.

Over yonder, behind Bill Hanson's graffiti-covered 'Bamabuilt paywall, there's an angry letter to the Jeffersonville-based editor from Grace Transue, who takes the New Albany Board of Public Works and Safety quite sternly to task for blithely ignoring persistent complaints about reckless driving and speeding on the city's one-way Elm Street racing corridor between the Interstate 64 ramp and Vincennes Street.

She makes pointed note of her perception of the board's cavalier attitude and dismissive body language, which actually serves to direct us to several fundamental truths in what SHOULD be a two-way discussion:

• A street designed for speeding will (duh) duly produce speeders
• The Board of Works apparently needs weekly exposure to informative weekly recitations highlighting bold new trends in urban modernity, ones mostly dating back to the city's founding
• The Board need not await unnecessary traffic studies to just do something about one-way streets designed for reckless and unsafe driving -- as previous boards have been asked to do for ten years running, or longer
• City Hall continues to gaze numbly upon this and other pressing aspects of the two-way street discussion with an expression resembling that of the proverbial wayward deer in the headlights of an Elm Street driver
• The police department's thoughts on speeding enforcement are, shall we say, cursory

We turn to a more detailed, non-metered source on the police department's recent (and brief) Elm Street observations, as Randy "The Bookseller" Smith explains all at The NewAlbanist:

“Move Along, Nothing to See Here”

In response to a request by a resident of Elm Street (you know who you are), Maj. Keith Whitlow offered up a report to the Board of Public Works and Safety at their regular Tuesday meeting.

As most anyone can tell you, and as everyone who lives on Elm Street can tell you, speeding is a chronic problem there, especially on its one-way stretch from I-64 to Vincennes Street.

In what was reported as a “shift” by Community Newspaper Holdings, Inc. of Montgomery, Ala., a police officer observed the traffic flow on Elm Street, presumably to ascertain whether there was, indeed, a problem with speeding.

On a street where the speed limit is generally 30 mph, and is highly trafficked at all hours, Maj. Whitlow says his assigned officer observed … 45 cars. (read the rest of the story)

Thank you, Randy.

---

In other news, it has been revealed that amid a budget crisis of their own making, Floyd County's bumbling governmental officials haven't yet appropriated the county's annual share of the Scribner Place YMCA payment. In fact, the city of New Albany has paid both its $137K bill AND picked up the tab for the county's $137K balance due.

Remember back when the county approved the yearly Y expenditure even as the city council's Gang of Four still sought to railroad it? We sure do: County backs Scribner Place, Gang of Four scrambling for new excuses (September 14, 2005).

That's right. We've been doing this for a while, haven't we?

At this point, dwelling any further on our county government's breathtaking bankruptcy -- a nadir not so much about cash as a gaping chasm of intellect and leadership -- would merely constitute a tasteless piling-on, so instead, let's consider the unexamined component, namely that the city's annual $137K payment for the Y comprises pretty much the entire expanse of its economic development plan for downtown, apart for periodic dribs and drabs from what's left of the Urban Enterprise Association since it was Norwooded.

Ah, but I have a dream: The city of New Albany spends a few thousand to repair a sidewalk untouched since the Inman Administration BEFORE an entrepreneur agrees to drop a cool million into rehabbing the building sitting behind it, rather than after.

Pro-active? It's a forgotten concept here by sanity's edge.

Hail to the thief. Long live the chain. I'm comfortably numb.

In conjunction this week with numerous other CNHI chain newspapers, the News and Tribune erected an on-line metered paywall. You'll even have to pay to read the explanation of why you have to pay, except that I already reprinted it.

To summarize conclusions gleaned from recent Twitter exchanges, the cost for electronic access is $10 per month, compared with $15 to receive newsprint according to the US Postal Service's delivery schedule. The "Front Page" it ain't.

Finally the most recent temporary publisher Bill "Sales, Not Content" Hanson has conceded that your monthly tithe will not buy a reprieve from the intrusive roll-over videos and pop-up/over/under, buzzing-gnat-like advertisements that justifiably render the newspaper's on-line interface a local laughingstock. For this reason, I'm in no mood to subscribe. I'm okay with the price, just not paying it to be insulted by a chain.

Last night at Twitter, Jeffersonville-based managing editor Shea Van Hoy reinforced Hanson's earlier insistence that working together, they produce an "excellent community newspaper," by cautioning me not to peek around the paywall.

I would ask, Roger, that you not post entire N&T articles to your blog, as you did w/council story. I'm fine if you want to post a link, as you have in the past. Otherwise, it's theft.

In short:

Roger, there'll be none of that. I've no intention during this life or any other to follow of once acknowledging that time in 2011 when I screwed you over about your column after you did me a favor, but if you would, please resume directing traffic toward our paywalled website, as NAC has done for nine years running with scant thanks from us -- but anything else is mere thievery, to be quelled by sending the Community Newspaper Gendarmes to your back door ... of course, as soon as we fly them up on coach from Alabama, to which a sizeable portion of the $120 yearly cost will be going to Dixiecrat pensioners, anyway, even as we continue to insist that somehow, in some convoluted and wholly imaginary way with fingers crossed behind our backs, we're not a chain.

Shrug. Yawn. Somewhere, a dog fertilizes a bush.

This topic effectively has jumped the shark, along with Doug England's future in politics and the notion that this city by sanity's edge actually possesses a downtown economic development strategy. With the periodic exception of lifers past the point of mobility, chain outlets typically are staffed by folks eventually moving elsewhere, to other chains, and so it will be with this one, too. Maybe the next batch will be better. Maybe not. Whatever. In the final analysis, it just isn't worth giving a tinker's damn one way or another.

As we await Trib Daniel’s inevitable rejoinders -- touchingly, he is the newspaper's Jim Fowler, wrestling diabetic hippos in the oozing swamp as his upper management emulates Marlon Perkins, sipping chilled daiquiris in the hovering executive copter -- permit me to note that I’m happy to comply with Van Hoy's warning.

Henceforth, I’ll offer only rough paraphrasings of whatever I read at the 'Bune and ‘Bamagator ... however I manage to read it, and as seldom as possible. After all, I'm far less a thief than a spy in the house of bile.

Cheers.

Escaping from Hauss Square, Birmingham AL and L'America itself? Get it in writing first.

Earlier in the week there were ruminations on the general topic of intellectualism's cruel fate within the political precincts comprising the city New Albany.

ON THE AVENUES: Anachronisms and intellectuals, here and there.

Hence, the tendency of New Albanian intellectuals to seek refuge in the cool embrace of Progressive Pints.

Forget for moment the blinding speed with which local ink-stained wretches, their pockets filled with 'Bama doubloons and Gideon screeds, rushed forward to Tweet my very point as it pertains to the media.

Rather, consider Bluegill's subsequent suggestion of reading material:

America -- the Grim Truth, by Lance Freeman (Escape from America Magazine)

Americans, I have some bad news for you:

You have the worst quality of life in the developed world – by a wide margin.

If you had any idea of how people really lived in Western Europe, Australia, New Zealand, Canada and many parts of Asia, you’d be rioting in the streets calling for a better life. In fact, the average Australian or Singaporean taxi driver has a much better standard of living than the typical American white-collar worker.

Another excerpt addresses our own peculiarly runted newsie institution.

If the people cannot make a change, how about the media? Not a chance. From Fox News to the New York Times, the mass media in the United States is nothing but the public relations wing of the corporatocracy, primarily the military industrial complex. At least the citizens of the former Soviet Union knew that their news was bullshit. In America, you grow up thinking you’ve got a free media, which makes the propaganda doubly effective. If you don’t think American media is mere corporate propaganda, ask yourself the following question: have you ever heard a major American news outlet suggest that the country could fund a single-payer health system by cutting military spending?

If only the Garner administration had made good on its promise of a million bucks. Come to think of it, just a dollar per broken promise in these burgs would add up to a plane ticket -- and that's just the spewspaper

Roudenbush spies newspaper picking nose, eating boogers in Coddington case.

Dennis Roudenbush asks the 'Bama Pop-Up Gazette to consider following up on story:

"I would like to ask the News and Tribune since they missed the boat for some reason not backing my accusations at that time."

Well, Dennis, the 'Bune's Jeffersonville-based management, for whom New Albany might as well be located just east of Albuquerque somewhere in Outer Mongolia, says it trusts senior staffer Chris Morris to relay the information worth publishing. But Morris traditionally refuses to ask disrespectful questions to venerated elders like Seabrook. And so it goes in a place where sports are more important than facts.

A round of applause to Dennis for getting it right even if the gatekeepers of southern fried journalism won't.

Former commissioners’ candidate says he was right on auditor

I appeared before the Floyd County Commissioners last spring complaining about how our auditor messed up the spring settlement checks using the wrong year. He overpaid the New Albany-Floyd County Consolidated School Corp. by $1.6 million.

He did not pay Georgetown Township one cent, which I am the trustee of, and when I asked him if he had informed the office-holders that he had overpaid NA-FC, he stated yes.

I then turned to Commissioners Bush, Seabrook and Freiberger and all three said that was the first they had heard about it. You can read and hear the audio on the minutes from that night’s meeting.

Mr. Seabrook told me the commissioners had nothing to do with the auditor. I would like to ask the News and Tribune since they missed the boat for some reason not backing my accusations at that time, do the right thing and print those minutes now for all to see what fools they were. If they would have listened and done their job, maybe this would have been prevented. By the way. I am passing out bumper stickers that say, “Don’t blame me, I voted for Roudenbush.”

— Dennis O. Roudenbush, New Albany

Look, ma, the 'Bune's finally taken a position on something.

But they sure circle them wagons with speed and efficiency, don't they?

'Bune's editorial board gets close, but loses scent in comments on Horseshoegate.

Yo: The News and 'Bune’s editorial board, composed of Publisher Bill Hanson, Editor Shea Van Hoy and Assistant Editors Chris Morris and Amy Huffman-Branham, musters a rare editorial.

Rarer still, the Jeffersonville-based board gets the overall conclusion right, albeit mostly for the wrong reasons.

OUR OPINION: Horseshoe plays losing hand with (Scott) Blair snub

If the Horseshoe Foundation isn’t a political entity, then it really shouldn’t base board member selection on party affiliation. If the board doesn’t want to change its spending policy, then it should handle that argument in a fair setting and allow the city council to be represented as its leader chooses.

The belly laughs begin with the notion that the Horseshoe Foundation is an apolitical entity, but let’s dry our eyes and soldier forward to the real reason why Blair’s selection so upsets the Foundation’s ideological apple cart: Politics, Seabrook-style.

Even people in North Korea, otherwise hermetically shielded from world events, intuitively grasp that when Blair contested the GOP’s anointment of Matt Oakley by running in the 6th council district as an independent and winning the seat handily, there’d be some variety of hell to pay from what passes for a Republican hierarchy hereabouts.

Note that party chairman Dave Matthews does not appear on this short list of GOP luminaries, which is topped by state representative Ed Clere and … wait for it … Mark Seabrook.

That’s right, it’s the very same, relentlessly partisan Mark Seabrook who controls the Republican majority on the board of county commissioners, and who also serves as majordomo of the Horseshoe Foundation board.

There isn’t enough concentrated gullibility on special at Wal-Mart for me to believe that Blair’s snub is a coincidence with Seabrook at the helm, calling the Foundation shots, although I’m absolutely certain that city council president Pat McLaughlin and the body's éminence grise, Dan Coffey, knew exactly what they were doing by lobbing Blair’s name to within range of Seabrook’s reach.

After this, Develop New Albany's strategy of stocking its board with non-profit functionaries should be even more frightening.

Anyway, nice try, 'Bune editorial board. You got at least some of it right. Now it’s back to the daily bible proverb listings.

Finally, a 'Bune popup that really tells it like it is.

Why yes, it is (unretouched, non-photoshopped).

White bread, skim milk, light beer.

From the safe distance of Jeffersonville, the 'Bune's editor peels away no layers, asks no questions, and accepts a council expenditure at face value. Sounds almost like a corporate policy ... or a council habit.

CHEERS

... to the New Albany City Council approving $75,000 to help restore Second Baptist Church, another important part of black history in New Albany.

Commonly called Town Clock Church, the building served as a link in the Underground Railroad during the Civil War.

Preserving it will help tell a vital lesson for the city and its residents and visitors.

— Editor Shea Van Hoy

Here's a clue, albeit it one outside the box of the 'Bune's business as usual: Future site of church steeple viewing zone.