Monday, February 14, 2011

Absolutely the best meal ever served on Formica.

It's working, guys. Here is a reply to my Tribune column of January 6, "A New Albanist’s Dictionary, Vol. 2." At 3,815 words, it is four times longer than the original essay. There is no title. Here's the link. Just one small complaint: You spelled "Weimar" incorrectly, even with cut and paste. Cheers.

---

THIS ARTICLE IS DEDICATED TO THE CITIZENS OF NEW ALBANY. WE WANT PEOPLE TO UNDERSTAND THE TRUE GIST OF WHAT OUR LOCAL COMMUNIST, ROGER BAYLOR, IS SAYING ABOUT ALL OF US WHO DO NOT AGREE WITH HIM AND DON'T RISE TO THE HEIGHTS OF GRANDEUR WHERE HE PLACES HIMSELF.

FIRST OFF, WHAT IS AN OPEN AIR MUSEUM: ACCORDING TO THE DICTIONARY AN OPEN AIR MUSEUM IS A DISTINCT TYPE OF MUSEUM EXHIBITING ITS COLLECTION OUT OF DOORS. WE CAN ONLY ASSUME THESE WORDS GRAVITATE TO HIS BRAIN WHEN HE IS ABLE TO BICYCLE AND CRUISE PAST LARRY KOCHERT'S HOUSE, STEVE PRICE'S HOUSE AND VICKI DENHART'S HOUSE. I'M NOT SURE WHY YOU WOULD BICYCLE THESE AREAS EXCEPT TO TRY AND GET ON THEIR NERVES OR AS AN INTIMIDATION FACTOR. (These are his words: Let’s begin the year with another revolving and evolving list of words, terms and concepts that provide a specialized vocabulary of life in the Open Air Museum. The first collection appeared Oct. 15, 2009.)

WHILE WE DO NOT BELIEVE MR. BAYLOR'S INTENTIONS ARE MEANT TO HONESTLY EDUCATE THE PEOPLE OF NEW ALBANY BUT RATHER TO CRITICIZE, MAKE FUN OF (AND I DO THINK HE THINKS HE IS HYSTERICALLY FUNNY), THE FOLLOWING STATEMENT HELPS DEFINE THE STUNNING DEPTHS OF THE NEW ALBANIAN ZEITGEIST (ZEIGEIST SIMPLY MEANS THE GENERAL INTELLECTUAL, MORAL, AND CULTURAL CLIMATE OF A GENERATION). I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU BUT HE IN NO WAY DEFINES MY INTELLECTUAL CAPACITIES, NOR MY MORALS, NOR DOES HE HAVE RIGHT TO PASS JUDGEMENT ON ANY ONE'S CULTURAL APTITUDES. THE BAD THING IS HE THINKS HE HAS EVERY RIGHT. (These are Baylor's words: It is my earnest goal to periodically refresh and expand this list, and your assistance is requested in doing so. Please send corrections, additions and comments to istanbul85@yahoo.com, and help define the forever stunning depths of the New Albanian zeitgeist.)

A MAJORITY OF CITIZENS TRULY FEEL NEW ALBANY DOES NOT HAVE CONTROL OVER OUR BUDGET MONIES AND THE ENGLAND ADMINISTRATION IS CONSTANTLY THREATENING THE CITIZENS BY THE FOLLOWING SOUND BITES: "Turn your cable off so you can pay your new increased sewer bills." "I'm going to cut back on cleaning snow and ice from the street rather than renegotiate the police and fire contracts who are taking 83% of our budget." IF WE CAN NOT TAKE CARE OF WHAT WE HAVE NOW WHY IN THE HEY WOULD WE WANT TO ANNEX ANYMORE PROPERTIES OR LAND UNLESS THE PLAN IS TO TRY AND RAISE OUR TAX LEVY AS JEFFERSONVILLE TRIED. UNFORTUNATELY, ANNEXATION DID PASS BUT NO ONE CRIED. (Here are Baylor's words: Annexation A wonderful thing to do, so long as you neither complete nor use it until long after the current council’s sell-by date.) ARE WE USING IT YET MR. BAYLOR?

THE NEXT WORD BAYLOR USES IS THE AXIS OF BANAL. ANY DEFINITION I FOUND REFERS TO THE AXIS OF BANAL BEING THE SAME AS THE AXIS OF EVIL. REGULARLY HE TORE THE FORMER COUNCIL MEMBERS UP, I.E., KOCHERT, SCHMIDT ETC., (EVEN BURNING EFFIGIES OF THEM BEFORE A MEETING ONE NIGHT), BUT THESE ARE HIS WORDS (THOUGH I CAN'T DECIDE IF HE MEANS CAESAR, ZURSCHMEIDE, MCGLAUGHLIN, MESSER, OR BENEDETTI, OR JUST WHO CONJOINS WITH PRICE AND COFFEE). (Here are Baylor's words: Axis of Banal The Steve Price/Dan Coffey conjoined city council obstruction club, usually with anywhere from one to seven other members quite eager to make it into a threesome.)


OF COURSE, BAYLOR'S LIST WOULDN'T BE COMPLETE WITHOUT A PAT ON HIS BACK ABOUT HE BEING ABLE TO BICYCLE AND I GUESS HE FEELS THIS MAY BE THE NAME ATTRIBUTED BY US NEW ALBANIANS BECAUSE OF HIS EXERCISE. THE TROGLODYTES HE LABELS ALL NEW ALBANIANS BY DEFINITION MEANS CAVEMAN, MEMBERS OF A PRIMITIVE RACE OR PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN CAVES. I MOST CERTAINLY AM NOT ONE OF THOSE AND EVERYONE IN NEW ALBANY WOULD AGREE WITH ME ON THIS ISSUE, BUT... (Here are Baylor's words: Bike boy Term of affection used by anonymous troglodytes to describe anyone who rides more miles on a bicycle in a given day than they’re capable of doing in a year). HE DOTH THINK SO HIGHLY OF HIMSELF AND SO LITTLE OF THE REST OF THE CITIZENS IN OUR FAIR TOWN.


BLUE LAWS WERE PUT INTO LEGISLATION BY THE STATE OF INDIANA. I, FOR THE LIFE OF ME, CAN NOT FIGURE OUT (WHETHER I LIKE COFFEY OR NOT, HOW HE CAN LAY HIS WANTING TO SELL CARRY OUT BEER ON SUNDAY AT COFFEY'S FEET), BUT HERE ARE HIS WORDS: (Here are Baylor's words: Blue Laws Sunday retail sales restrictions lovingly fetishized (no such word) by Councilman Cappuccino, implying the restoration of rotary dial telephones, one-piece bathing suits, asbestos insulation and mail delivered by Pony Express.) I WOULD GUESS HE REALLY HATES BOSTON WHERE BLUE LAWS ARE STILL IN EFFECT AND YOU CAN NOT EVEN SHOP ON SUNDAY. BUT THEN AGAIN, HE DOES HAVE A HANGUP WITH RELIGION.


RATHER THAN USING HIS WIDE BRUSH STROKE TO PAINT ALL CITIZENS NOT DOING RIGHT BY NOT BUYING LOCAL (WHICH A LOT OF US DO) HE HAS TO TAKE A SWIPE EVEN WHERE PEOPLE GAS UP THEIR CARS. WHAT HE FAILS TO DO IN HIS ARTICLE IS TO LIST THE GAS STATIONS WHO ARE LOCAL. TO ME, THAT WOULD HAVE REQUIRED TOO MUCH WORK ON HIS PART. (Here are Baylor's words: Buy Local Saving gas by shopping at the mega-chain retailer nearest one’s house.) CAN WE GET SOME ONE TO TELL US WHERE HE GASES UP?

THE DEFINITION OF A CAUCUS MEANS A GROUP OF POLITICIANS WHO GET TOGETHER AND SELECT THEIR CANDIDATES. THERE WAS ONE ILLEGAL MEETING WHERE A MAJORITY OF COUNCIL GOT TOGETHER IN A BAR BUT NOTHING EVER CAME FROM IT. WE CAN ONLY ASSUME THIS SITUATION IS WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT BUT AT THE SAME TIME, THEY WERE ALL HIS BUDDIES: (Here are Baylor's words: Caucus A city council meeting that isn’t, as attended only by those council members who won’t admit aloud to being Republican, as opposed to the single one who will. Quorum due to expire in November, 2011.) DO YOU KNOW, AS I DO, WHO IS A DEMOCRAT ON THE CURRENT COUNCIL, WHO IS A REPUBLICAN AND WHO WAFFLES BETWEEN? I DO BUT I GUESS HE DOES NOT.

THERE HAS BEEN A POLITICAL ACTION COMMITTEE FORMED IN NEW ALBANY, JOINED BY HUNDREDS, BOTH DEMOCRAT AND REPUBLICAN. LEGAL PAPERS AND MONIES AND REPORTING RECORDS ARE FILED IN THE FLOYD COUNTY CLERK'S OFFICE. THE PAC IS CALLED CITIZENS FOR ACCOUNTABILITY. A VOTE WAS HELD BY MEMBERS (I WAS THERE) AND MS. VICKI DENHART WAS ELECTED THE PRESIDENT. IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT SOMETHING WHICH SETS MR. BAYLOR'S BLOOD BOILING BECAUSE HE CANNOT FIND OUT WHO BELONGS TO THIS PAC, JUST MENTION CITIZENS FOR ACCOUNTABILITY. I HAVE A FEELING; NO, I KNOW THIS TO BE TRUE; WHEN HE DOES FIND OUT IT WILL BE TOO LATE FOR HIM AND HE AND THE POWERS TO BE WHO DON'T WANT TO DO THE RIGHT THING AND THEY WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT HIT THEM COME ELECTION TIME! (Here are Baylor's words: Citizens Faux Accountability Hillary Clinton fan club, run by a chain smoker from a post office box near a Gucci outlet somewhere in Italy.) I BET HE WISHES THAT WAS/IS THE CASE.

THEN, HE TAKES A SWIPE AT TEACHERS TRYING TO BRING STUDENTS IN TO COUNCIL MEETINGS FOR A LESSON IN CIVICS. AS A TEACHER WHO HAVE BROUGHT MY OWN STUDENTS IN FOR COUNCIL MEETINGS I NEVER EXPECTED THEM TO UNDERSTAND THE SUBJECTS AT HAND, SIMPLY TO GRASP A FEELING OF HOW, IN GENERAL, PEOPLE GATHER AND VOTE. (Here are Baylor's words: City Council Place where the high school civics class kids are obliged to go ... for detention. (DS)) HE LEFT OUT THE BOY SCOUTS AND OTHER ORGANIZATIONS WHO ATTEND. MUST HAVE BEEN SHORT ON COLUMN SPACE THAT DAY.

AND, A LIFE IN THE DAY OF BAYLOR WOULD NO BE COMPLETE WITHOUT WHAT I CONSIDER HIS ASININE RAVINGS ABOUT ED CLERE. BAYLOR DOES NOT HAVE THE NERVE, THE MONEY, NOR THE WHEREWITHAL TO EVEN CONSIDER RUNNING FOR PUBLIC OFFICE. BUT BY GOSH, IF YOU ARE AND DO AND WIN, YOU HAD BEST DROP EVERYTHING YOU ARE DOING FOR ALL THE PEOPLE AND ANSWER TO HIS WHIM, IMMEDIATELY! OR, YOU TOO, WILL BE SUBJECT TO THE RIDICULE THE ENTIRE TOWN CAN NOT ESCAPE. (Here are Baylor's words: Clere Channel Network Where communication is a one-way street, and the street has no name.)

BEING A CONSERVATIVE DOESN'T NECESSARILY MEAN YOU ARE A DEMOCRAT OR A REPUBLICAN IN MY EYES. I KNOW LIBERAL PUBS AND LIBERAL DEMS AND CONSERVATIVE PUBS AND CONSERVATIVE DEMS. THE ENTIRE COUNTRY IS IN DIRE NEED OF THE CONSERVATION OF OUR MONIES AS HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF PUBLIC SERVANTS AND ENTIRE GOVERNMENTS ARE LOSING THEIR JOBS. MR. BAYLOR DOES NOT BELIEVE IN BEING CONSERVATIVE WHEN IT COMES TO OUR MONEY. NO ONE CAN FIGURE OUT HIS RHYME OR REASON FOR WANTING TO SPEND, SPEND, SPEND. IN HIS WORDS WHICH FOLLOW, PLEASE ALLOW ME TO EXPLAIN WHAT HE MEANS BY ATTILA THE HUN. HE WAS THE MOST SUCCESSFUL BARBARIAN INVADER AND ALSO CONSIDERED UNGODLY. (NO SURPRISE THERE.) THE WIEMAR PART IS WHERE GERMANY ESTABLISHED AN IMPERIAL FORM OF GOVERNMENT WHICH EVENTUALLY LED TO THE RISE OF ADOLPH HITLER (NO SURPRISE THERE, EITHER). THE BIRDSEYE BLUES MEANS TO THINK FROM AN ELEVATED STATE HIGH ABOVE THE REST OF THE CITIZENS OF NEW ALBANY. (Here are Baylor's words: Conservatism Political trait that Floyd County Democrats typically claim to possess to a greater degree than their Republican rivals, who themselves are somewhere to the right of Attila the Hun, leaving the remainder of us stuck inside of Wiemar with the Birdseye blues again.)

THE NEXT PARAGRAPH HE WRITES WRAPS A BLANKET AROUND ANY DISCUSSIONS, ANY DIFFERENT POINTS OF VIEW, AND OR OPPOSITION OCCURRING DURING CITY COUNCIL MEETINGS AND ARE SELF-EXPLANATORY (BELIEVE IT OR NOT). (These are Baylor's words: Controversy The insertion of rationality, usually unintentional, into a given political discussion during city council meetings.) OBVIOUSLY NONE OF THE AFOREMENTIONED ACTIONS ARE ALLOWED UNDER HIS COMMUNISTIC OUTLOOK.

HIS NEXT STATEMENT IS ALSO HIS ATTEMPT TO BE CUTE AND TO CONTINUE HIS RIDICULE OF ANYTHING OR ANYONE WHO STRIKES HIS FANCY. (These are Baylor's words: Discussion At city council, any stray verbiage randomly issued as a means to avoid contemplation of the actual issue(s) at hand.) I FEEL BAYLOR WANTS AND NEEDS TOTALITARIAN RULE OR NO RULE AT ALL (PART OF THAT COMMUNIST THING/IDEALS).

THERE HAVE BEEN A LOT OF NEW BUSINESSES LOCATING DOWNTOWN AND A LARGE GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE TIME, ENERGY, AND MONEY INVESTED. THIS NEXT STATEMENT IS HOW HE FEELS THE CITIZENS OF NEW ALBANY THINK ABOUT THESE EFFORTS. (These are Baylor's words: Cracker Barrel Long-awaited Nirvana for downtown revitalization advocates who really don’t understand downtown revitalization at all.) DOES IT INFURIATE YOU AS MUCH AS ME AND MINE HOW SHORT HE SELLS THE CITIZENS OF NEW ALBANY WHO ARE TRYING THEIR DARNDEST TO SUCCEED?

MR. BAYLOR TRIES TO MISLEAD THE PUBLIC IN HIS NEXT STATEMENT ABOUT EDIT. THE MAYOR DECIDES WHERE HE WANTS ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT TO OCCUR AND THEN COMES TO THE COUNCIL FOR THE MONIES. UNFORTUNATELY FOR CITIZENS OF NEW ALBANY, THE MAYOR AT ONE TIME WAS FOUND TO HAVE BOUGHT PERSONAL SUITS OUT OF EDIT. THERE HAS RECENTLY BEEN LEGISLATION TRYING TO GET FUNDS, EVEN IF THEY ARE FROM EDIT, TO GET OUR CITY OUT OF THE HOLE. NO, BAYLOR DOESN'T SEE IT THIS WAY (NOR THAT WAY) AND HAS MORE TO GRIPE ABOUT. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: EDIT Crucial economic development monies designed to remain inert until needed by office holders as penny-wise, pound-foolish subsidies, rather than economic development monies.) DIDN'T HIS PATIO COME OUT OF EDIT? MAYBE I'M GENERALIZING LIKE HIM. HEAVEN FORBID.

MR. BAYLOR ALSO TRIES TO RIDE HERD ON ALL BLOGS MAINTAINING YOU MAY BE THE WORST OF THE WORST IF YOU DO NOT PUT YOUR NAME TO OPINIONS YOU MAY HAVE. TO A LOT OF PEOPLE IT IS SIMPLY HIS DESIRE TO CONTROL SPEECH AND TO LAMBASTE ANYONE WHO DOES NOT AGREE WITH HIS THOUGHTS. AS LEGAL BEAGLE PUTS IT, HE IS A COWARD BEHIND A KEYBOARD AND A CYBER BULLY. I AGREE. THERE ARE FOUR BLOGS IN NEW ALBANY. NEW VOICE OF THE PEOPLE (WHO REVIEW COMMENTS BEFORE BEING PUBLISHED); CITY OF NEW ALBANY (WHO DEMANDS YOUR NAME); FREEDOMOFSPEECH (WHICH DOES NOT ALLOW COMMENTS OF ANY KIND); AND KITCHENTABLEISSUES (WHERE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LEAVE YOUR NAME). WELL, IF YOU GO ANONYMOUS ON TWO OF THE BLOGS WHO ALLOW SAME YOU ARE A NO GOOD ROTTEN SO AND SO. JUST ASK MR. BAYLOR. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Freedom of Speech 1. Local blog that does not allow reader comments 2. Condition that applies to you but not the person with whom you disagree.) NO ONE AGREES WITH EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME, DUH.

THIS NEXT DEFINITION, AS BAYLOR CALLS IT, IS HANDICAPPING. THIS SEEMS TO BE ANOTHER ATTEMPT ON HIS PART TO SIMPLY BE CUTE: (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Handicapping A New Albany voter’s perpetual calculation: Is an incorruptible politician who is wrong 100 percent of the time better or worse than a corruptible politician who is right half the time?) YEAH, I THINK I WANT INCORRUPTIBLE POLITICIANS THOUGH THE GOOD LORD KNOWS THEY ARE HARD TO FIND.

WE ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPY HOUR IS (WHOOPPEE). BUT, THIS SENTENCE SHOULD SERVE TO REMIND ALL READERS HOW MR. BAYLOR DOES BRING HIS FLASK IN AND IS USUALLY SLAP HAPPY WHILE OBSERVING COUNCIL MEETINGS (ALONG WITH HIS BUDDIES). (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Happy Hour 60 affectionate minutes with your hip flask before the council meeting starts.)

THE HISTORICAL PRESERVATION COMMISSION IS SOMETHING MOST OF US AGREE ON. WHERE WE MAY DISAGREE IS THE FACT SOME HOUSES ARE PAST BEING PRESERVED AND A WASTE OF TIME AND GOOD MONEY. RATHER THAN GOING AFTER THE ADMINISTRATION WHO ALLOWED THESE PROPERTIES TO FALL DOWN INTO DISREPAIR AND DID NOTHING UNTIL PRIVATE CITIZENS HELPED FORM THIS GROUP BAYLOR TENDS TO SIMPLY LAMBASTE CITIZENS WITH NO CREDIT GIVEN TO THE ONES WHO HAVE FOUGHT FOR CODE ENFORCEMENT FOR OVER 20 YEARS. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Historical Preservation Commission Power-hungry zealots who refuse to admit that the rental property you’ve chronically neglected for decades merely is a dilapidated building suitable only for tenants.)

SOME PEOPLE FEEL THE HISTORICAL PRESERVATION COMMITTEE SHOULD CONSIST OF ELECTED OFFICIALS (NOT POLITICAL APPOINTEES ON POWER TRIPS) HAS BAYLOR FEELING AND WRITING THE FOLLOWING (WHAT I ASSUME AGAIN HE CONSIDERS CUTE) WORDS: (This is Mr. Baylor's words: Infinite Monkey Theorem Expression of mathematical probability suggesting that if given enough time, an ape typing at random would eventually write Shakespeare’s “Hamlet” — or an ordinance outlawing the Historical Preservation Commission.)

I WOULD GUESS THE WHOLE TOWN KNOWS OF MR. BAYLOR'S AVERSION TO LARRY KOCHERT. AND, I WOULD ASSUME THE WHOLE TOWN KNOWS OF MR. KOCHERT'S AVERSION TO MR. BAYLOR. TO THIS DAY, AFTER FOUR YEARS, MR. BAYLOR STILL FEELS THE NEED TO RUN MR. KOCHERT DOWN ANY CHANCE HE GETS. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Leotards Skin-tight leg wraps that threaten the fragile masculinity of a former Gang of Four council stalwart; also called “tights,” as in, “Let’s all get tights, and vote in my garage for a change.”) WHAT MR. BAYLOR MAY NOT UNDERSTAND IS WHAT THE REST OF THE PEOPLE THINK ABOUT HIM, HA HA HA.

SINCE MR. BAYLOR CONSIDERS HIMSELF A FLOYD COUNTY SNOB AND THE CITY OF NEW ALBANY IS BENEATH HIM (WHILE FOR THE LIFE OF ME I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY HE WANTS OUR MONEY AND THINK WE CARE WHAT HE THINKS -- HERE ARE HIS WORDS SUMMING UP THE TRUE MEANING OF A FLOYD COUNTY SNOB: (These are Mr. Baylor's words: New Albany Bicentennial A time for remembering what it was like in 1813, and for accepting that we’re mostly still there.) NEW ALBANY HAS COME A LONG WAY BABY, WITHOUT YOUR HELP, WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT.

THE NEXT SHOT IS AGAIN AIMED AT THE CITIZENS AND THEIR ELECTED COUNCIL REPRESENTATIVES AND HOW WE CAN NEVER EVER POSSIBLY UNDERSTAND WHY THE OLD NEW ALBANY BREAD STORE GOT A BEER MONUMENT PLACED IN FRONT OF BAYLOR'S BUSINESS. MOST OF US FEEL THERE SHOULD HAVE BEEN A LOAF OF BREAD PUT THERE. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: New Albany Bicentennial Public Art Project Placements of art intended for the edification of the common man, consequently eluding the comprehension of the council members whose downtown districts house them.)

THESE NEXT WORDS, AGAIN, INSINUATE HOW ALL CITIZENS OF NEW ALBANY ARE IGNORANT, SUPERSTITIOUS AND BACKWARDS. HOW LONG DOES HE THINK HE CAN KEEP INSULTING THE GOOD PEOPLE OF NEW ALBANY? (These are Mr. Baylor's words:
Open Air Museum of Ignorance, Superstition and Backwardness 1. Citywide folkways theme park devoted to the reality of life in New Albany: “We have met the enemy, and he is us.” 2. “Give us more fish. Don’t you dare teach us how to fish.” 3. Place where tolls (in squandered modernity) already are being collected.)

THE NEIGHBORHOOD PARKING PERMIT ISSUE WAS BROUGHT BY A CITIZEN IN NEW ALBANY (DOES MR. BULLEIT KNOW ABOUT THIS) AND THESE WORDS ARE SIMPLY A MOCKERY OF SAME, WHETHER ANY OF US AGREED OR DISAGREED WITH THE LEGISLATION (WHICH I DIDN'T). (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Neighborhood Parking Permit
A plan to surrender public street space for private use, to appease private property owners who are unwilling to give up their own privately held property for the exact same purpose (JG).)

ANOTHER BURR UNDER BAYLOR'S SADDLE IS ONE SOUTHERN INDIANA. WE DON'T LIKE THIS GROUP OF PEOPLE NOR APPROVE OF THEIR METHODS AND THEIR INTENT ON GETTING TOLLS, BUT WE ARE SO TIRED OF HIM GOING ON AND ON ABOUT 1SI, CLERE, ETC. DO YOU THINK HE WILL EVER UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH HE REPEATS AND HOW TIRESOME IT BECOMES? I DON'T THINK SO. ANYWAY. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: One Southern Indiana 1. Organization dedicated to preserving the wealth of its highest-standing members by erecting a wall running the length of the Ohio River. 2. Synonym for “blatant hypocrisy.”)

THE NEXT DESCRIPTION OF WORDS REFLECTS HOW MUCH HE DOES DRINK AND HOW MUCH HE HATES IT WHEN HE RUNS OUT OF LIQUOR AT COUNCIL MEETINGS: (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Post-Partum Depression Your empty flask after the council meeting.) SEEING IT IS STILL IMPOSSIBLE FOR A MAN TO HAVE A BABY, I GUESS HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT A SERIOUS ILLNESS POST-PARTUM DEPRESSION IS NOR HOW MANY PEOPLE HE MAY HAVE OFFENDED COMPARING THIS ILLNESS TO AN EMPTY FLASK OF LIQUOR.

THERE ARE NUMEROUS CITIZENS AND CHRISTIANS WHO DECRIED AN OPENING OF A PORN SHOP ACROSS FROM A CHURCH AND AT A SCHOOL BUS STOP. BUT, WITH MR. BAYLOR'S SELF PROCLAIMED HEDONISTIC WAYS WE CAN UNDERSTAND HIS FEELINGS ON THE FOLLOWING. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Reclaim Our Culture Kentuckiana (ROCK) Group suffering from a chronic allergy to 2010 calendars, and seeking the curative measure of “reclaiming” things they cannot define, because those things never existed. See also: Torquemada Twist, Wickensianism (no such word).)

AGAIN, WE ALL KNOW HOW MR. BAYLOR FEELS ABOUT GOVERNOR DANIELS. WE MAY OR MAY NOT LIKE HIM EITHER, OR MAY NOT LIKE SOME LEGISLATION, BUT BAYLOR DOES GO ON AND ON. THERE HAVE BEEN A LOT OF ISSUES OR PEOPLE I HAVE VOTED FOR TO NO AVAIL BUT BY GOSH I AM ABLE TO MOVE ON. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Saint Daniels The reason why we have incense, prayer, One Southern Indiana, charter schools and bridge tolls.)

WHEN THE LOCAL SCHOOL SYSTEM ROLLED OUT THE 60 MILLION DOLLAR BOND ISSUES A LOT OF GOOD CITIZENS FOUGHT THIS ISSUE ESPECIALLY WHEN IT WAS PUT ON OUR BACKS WITH PROPERTY TAXES. SOME OF US STILL MAINTAIN THIS IS WHY LOCAL SCHOOLS WERE CLOSED AND WAS NOT DUE TO MR. CLERE BUT LIES ON THE BACK OF OUR THEN UNELECTED SCHOOL BOARD. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: School closings 1. Rituals of solemn necessity preceding a pay increase for an impoverished superintendent.
2. A heaven-sent occasion for conniving school board members, often Republicans, to plot their next political campaigns. 3. An atrocity that Superman (R-72) curiously missed.)

THE ONGOING SEWER FIASCO IN NEW ALBANY WHERE HOUSES AND BUSINESSES ARE STILL NOT BEING SERVED HAD TWO PEOPLE WHO ATTENDED EVERY SEWER BOARD MEETING AND SPENT UNTOLD HOURS TRYING TO BRING NEW ALBANY INTO A CLEAN ENVIRONMENT. THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SENDING SEWAGE DOWN PAST THE MAYOR'S HOUSE AS THE SEWERS LITERALLY WERE/ARE STILL GOING INTO THE OHIO RIVER. BUT, MR. BAYLOR'S WORDS ARE SIMPLY SELF-SERVING AND SHOWS HIS LACK OF RESPECT FOR OUR NATURAL RESOURCES AND THE POLLUTION THIS CITY ADDS TO THE OHIO RIVER. SIMPLY ANOTHER WAY TO GET HIS ROCKS OFF AT OTHER PEOPLE'S EXPENSE. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Sewergeddon The Potty Police’s plan to employ diggers and reclaim the city’s culture by flushing raw sewage through street-side ditches past the mayor’s house, at a fraction of the cost of conventional sewage treatment.) HE MUST NOT HAVE BEEN AROUND WHEN THE SEWAGE WAS RUNNING PAST RESIDENTS HOMES AND ALL OF THE HOUSES ON MAIN STREET WENT DIRECTLY INTO THE OHIO RIVER AFTER RESIDENTS RECEIVED SEWER BILLS FOR TWENTY YEARS. ISN'T THAT MAIL FRAUD - RECEIVING A BILL FOR SERVICES NOT RENDERED? DOES HE CARE? DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH. HE'S THE JOKE.

AND, LAST BUT NOT LEAST, STEVE PRICE. MR. BAYLOR WILL BE GLAD TO HEAR THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS WHO WANT TO RUN AGAINST MR. PRICE IN THE UPCOMING ELECTION BECAUSE THEY LIKE HIM. IF I COULD THINK OF ONE THING MR. PRICE VOTED NO ON THAT IMPEDED MR. BAYLOR'S AGENDA MAYBE I COULD GO THERE. BUT, THE ADMINISTRATION'S AGENDA (ENGLAND'S) HAS ALWAYS TRIUMPHED AND TO HELL WITH THE BUDGETS, OVER STAFFING, WASTE OF THE MONEY, ETC. JUST KEEP SAYING NO, STEVE. WE STAND BEHIND YOU. (These are Mr. Baylor's words: Steve Price Synonym for “no,” spoken in Dewey Heights dialect. ) BY THE WAY, A LOT OF GOOD PEOPLE WERE BORN AND RAISED IN THE DEWEY HEIGHTS DISTRICT AND YOU REALLY DO ALL A DISSERVICE.

NEXT???? SORRY FOR THE LONG POST, BUT YOU KNOW HOW IT IS WHEN YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH AN EGO MANIAC (MY DESCRIPTION).

I WOULD GO TO GREAT LENGTHS TO FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT TO NOT BELIEVE IN OUR GOOD LORD AND RELIGION, BUT TO HAVE YOU POST IN AN ARTICLE YOU WANTED US ALL TO PRAY FOR THE PEOPLE WHO WORK FOR YOU TO BE ABLE TO LIFT THOSE KEGS SO YOU CAN MAKE MONEY REALLY TICKED ME OFF. BUT, THIS SIMPLY MADE ME PRAY HARDER FOR YOU, NOT THEM.

Y A W N

Posted by What'sThat? at 2:32 AM
Labels: COMMUNISM, EGO MANIACS

8 comments:

The New Albanian said...

A Progressive Pint to the first person who can explain what Communism has to do with any of this.

Drew said...

I guess one of the words you didn't define was Communist.

Communist - Anyone who doesn't worship St. Daniels.

w&la said...

I have to admit I got lost when I saw the claim you were "intimidating" our elected officials by bicycling past their homes.

I thought "intimidating biker" usually had something to do with motorcycles. If open air physical fitness is intimidating to our elected officials, we're worse off than I had imagined.

Iamhoosier said...

I guess most of us go "on and on" sometimes. I'm really glad the writer of that piece was brief.(for those thick headed--that was sarcasm)

Buy local gas? The writer totally missed the point. AIR BALL!!!!

And back to "on and on", anyone ever hear or read about, "England is a crook"? "Baylor is a communist, atheist, etc."? "FBI will arrest..."? "We have proof"?

Iamhoosier said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jeff Gillenwater said...

Disco still sucks.

Iamhoosier said...

I believe that "they" would agree with you, Jeff. Disco would be much too modern.

Ruthanne said...

Yawn. I actually did. One can take only so much SCREAMING before fatigue sets in. This blog needs a closed caption option.