(Cue ominous music from the soundtrack of "Jaws")
The gripping post-election scandal was first revealed in a breathless letter to the editor from the victims:
On Wednesday morning, the night after the elections, we woke up to an unsettling sight at our homes. When we looked out onto our front lawns we realized that someone had been to our homes in the middle of the night without being invited. Some people came to our homes and placed many Doug England for Mayor Signs all over our front yards. They did this because we either supported Randy Hubbard for Mayor or because we are friends with Randy Hubbard supporters.
(Sirens are heard screaming in the background as people flee to bomb shelters)
Duly prompted, the blog debate began simmering:
Anonymous said...
WHAT A MESS! Is someone going to file charges with the prosecutor against the persons involved in the vandalism of private property by flooding ENGLAND FOR MAYOR signs in several persons yards after the election?
Former Tribune staffer Amany Ali, herself a victim, then contributed a guest column on the topic:
Tribune readers may remember a recent letter to the editor that told of an election-night prank that involved the placement of election signs in yards of folks who supported the Republican candidate who lost the New Albany mayor’s race. I did not support that candidate. However, I am a friend with a couple, who happen to be Republicans, who did support that candidate. That being the case, six yard signs were placed in my yard. The moronic part of that is I actually campaigned for the winning candidate.
(Dick Cheney appears on the screen dressed in Army fatigues. He is fondling a nail studded baseball bat ... and drooling)
In the grand tradition of innuendo, all involved naturally claim to know the identity of the signage perpetrators, some of whom may have already apologized for being so typically New Albanian, but none of them will reveal names. Wouldn’t that simple act alone bring shame raining down on the wretched households of the sicko perps, and dissuade them from again committing such heinous crimes?
(Ding! Ding! Ding! )
Congratulations, New Albany. Our municipality now has expended more words in murkily debating a forgettable, sophomoric prank than were spoken altogether about pertinent local issues during the actual election campaign.
Folks, we’re talking about yard signs here – you know, those unsightly visual pollutants that contribute nothing to political discourse, prevent no one from voting a straight party ticket, are illegally placed in right of ways where they don’t belong by people like Larry Kochert who don’t care about rules, and that serve overall to remind us that local politics remains about nothing so much as donating a patch of lawn to your wife’s first cousin’s buddy from kindergarten so he can advertise his candidacy for city cawncil.
By the way, for those interested in the full dimension of 1SI muteness, it's Day 13 of the Michael Dalby/One Southern Indiana stonewall watch. Now, that's an outrage.
You know Roger, about one week before the elections, a strange wind blew up before a storm, and uprooted a yard sign for a particular candidate and left it lying in the wet leaves.
ReplyDeleteAct of God? Deliberate political oppression by a diabolical local indvidual who has a machine to control the weather?
Or could this possibly be related to the great Sign-gate scandal of 2007?
And in other news......
ReplyDeleteMaury
I agree that such signage should be banned altogther as they are unsightly and seem to have little effect.
ReplyDeletePerhaps then candidates would have to secure an election the old fashioned way. They would have to "earn it" by pounding the sidwalks and expressing themselves on issues face to face with the voter.
Save a tree and burn up some shoe leather. It's healthier for everyone!
BTW, on the 1SI gig...keep on keepin' on!