ASK THE BORED: All for paving and paving for all -- and information about the elusive two-way street project's inception.

At last week's Board of Public Works and Safety meeting (May 2), there was an update on the critically important annual paving extravaganza, without which those delicate rivulets of campaign slush 'n' finance would be in danger of drying up -- and the usual suspects can't wet their beaks in sand.

As the above explanation attests, the grid modernization project (have you noticed how reluctant they are to use the words "two-way" if they can be avoided?) is a paving project all its own.

And: Once paved, the streets still will be running in one-direction with temporary markings. This should add at least 10 m.p.h. to current motorcycle speeds on Spring.

Then again, this Market Street canyon needs work. There's enough room inside this cut for a street car rail.

I'm consoling myself with the prospect of seeing these miscreants in single file, stuck behind me as I observe the speed limit on two-way streets. They might try passing me on the right, though they'll be in danger of striking the landscaping trailer that usually occupies the bike lane in front of my house.

Then, when the motorists are calmed, we can begin thinking about the much needed ban on semi rigs using 13th Street.

ASK THE BORED: A few well-placed chicanes on 13th Street should send Tiger Trucking to a more appropriate location for doing its value-extractive business.