As noted previously, I have been asked by Lt. McGrowroom of the Potty Police to answer questions pertaining to toleration, numerology and certain other local bowel movements, and ever the gracious host, I’ll be posting these thoughts here on my blog, not at the location where they were first asked. That's because it's just the way I am.
2. Why do you not insist the Council be given their monthly printouts of the financials (as required by law) so they can do their job?
For those just tuning in, the “financials” are holy canonical scrolls provided to Adam and Eve before the tragic fall. What the occupants of the Garden of Eden didn’t grasp amid the bedlam (and crazed sex) produced by drinking the fermented apple juice proffered by the serpent (a copperhead snake, no doubt) is that those in possession of the financials are in a position to control the lifeblood of civil society, and since civil society is the domain of knowledge, art, culture, learning and a guaranteed monthly allotment of lottery tickets, to reduce the life of every citizen to that of a number tattooed on their arms.
The exact amount they paid in, and the exact amount they get back, and if there’s a way to send the financials to Wal-Mart instead, well, that’s even better, because then the scrolls can be transported in an ox cart down unpaved streets to the nearest helipad for transport to Beijing, and even cheaper plastic trinkets for Christmas.
If the council is not getting their financials, perhaps the members should appeal to the ordinance enforcement officials they refuse to empower and ask with all due Confucian polite detachment that the numbers be handed over. If they haven’t done so yet, then I’m uncertain as to whether a mere Publican can make the difference, but I’m willing to insist: Please, give them the numerical Viagra to make a difference in our lives, amen, thank you, and LOL.