Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Erika's teapartying: Obama's a muslin! Obama's a muslin!

Erika's taken to writing Top Ten lists in her sleep, which is to say, during every waking hour. I came up with one, too.

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FREEDOM TO SCREECH TOP TEN LIST

10. I’ve lied to readers for five years by pretending to be a guy with a history degree when I’m not, and don’t.

9. I have changed my family dog's name to "Roger’s Patio," and am kicking him harder than I did before.

8. Black is black, white is white, muslin is a type of cloth, and I know less about world religions than Steve Price.

7. I would appoint David Brambleberry (“under God”) to replace my sister who fired me, except he doesn’t live here and hers is a county, not city, job.

6. If Maria Granger thinks she’s getting the Woman of the Year this time around, she has another thought coming.

5. If Hillary would have won, and not the black guy, I’d enthusiastically support her policies, which would have been precisely the same as his – but I’m not a hypocrite or anything.

4. I hate those pointy headed people who’ve come downtown and actually gotten things done. How dare they prove us wrong!

3. I recommend all Americans invest in big damned dogs, because we can’t afford to pay the police to protect us.

2. Before I leave this blog, I will belch even more lies about people and ideas that I hate.

1. Don't worry, little people. I’ll continue to fight the modern world even as you get poorer and increasingly marginalized. Just don’t say my real name out loud, or anything like that.

3 comments:

Iamhoosier said...

Uh, that's a poli sci degree, not history. We poli sci people prefer not be asscociated with people like Roz Tate. (grin)

Bayernfan said...

I'm sure it was one of the "staff" who wrote the FOS Top 10 lists. And no, it's not nearly as witty as Letterman, just incredibly ignorant and sad...just what we've come to expect from that crowd.

lawguy said...

I think its amusing that she concludes with a question...."Dont you agree" with no place to comment either way.

If a rhetorical question falls in the woods and there is nobody there to hear it...

Nevermind.