Sunday, January 07, 2007

Silly me - I thought it was a death metal band.

In a very few hours I arrived in a city that always makes me think of a whited sepulcher. Prejudice no doubt.
-- Joseph Conrad, from "Heart of Darkness."

The novel's protagonist is referring to Brussels, capital of Belgium. It isn't certain whether Conrad ever came near New Albany.

As (variously) a non-churchgoer, an atheist, a Communist, a progressive, and a drunkard, to use just a few of the colorfully descriptive things said about me both by friends and enemies, the former generally rolling their eyes and the latter usually securely anonymous from afar, every now and then someone pulls out a phrase that even I haven’t heard in a while.

It was yesterday, at the slowly reviving Luddite Bar & Grill, otherwise known as SOLNA, or Speak Out, Lout (NA), that the obscure Biblical reference was wielded:

Anonymous said...

To hear you talk Roger Baylor. You have it all, done it all, and so worldly. But.....your still the biggest whited sepulcher in New Albany.

5:42 PM, January 06, 2007

Heavy artillery, indeed, and "sez you" or "your mama" fall short as potential retorts. For the record, here's the definition of “whited sepulcher,” courtesy of http://www.answers.com/:

whit·ed sepulcher (hwī'tĭd, wī'-) n. An evil person who pretends to be holy or good; a hypocrite. [From the simile applied by Jesus to hypocrites as exemplified by some scribes and Pharisees (Matthew 23:27).]


Hmm. Now, in addition to being on the mayor's payroll, riding a bicycle because of a drunk driving conviction, and being jealous of Professor Erika, I'm also evil. Who'd make such an accusation? Let's see, what clues to we have?

We're in New Albany, and we know that the fan mail comes from devout coward wearing a mask.

Boy, that sure narrows it down.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yep. The fearless "Anonymous" strikes again. I wonder if they ever read the numerous passages where Jesus speaks about not judging others. At least you were insulted in an articulate manner! I've had people say pretty nasty things but not nearly as well.

Ann said...

Actually, Whited Sepulchre would be a good name for a band . . .

I do seem to recall, New Albanian, that when we were both students at FCHS, we were both reading tutors for some elementary kids at Georgetown, and on a couple of occasions, I suspected that you were setting the timer ahead to shave a few minutes off the 15-minute tutoring time so you could get done sooner.

Perhaps that is when your evil self was beginning to emerge. And to think, I was right there,

Wow.

Highwayman said...

Strange the things you learn about people when you really get to know them.

You realize of course that by quoting the scripture, albeit from afar, you've inadvertnently supported the allegation.

But wait, that would require ANON to connect the dots, verify the reference, and then draft a response.

Nah, on second thought you're safe.

The New Albanian said...

Annie reveals further closeted (?) skeletons of mine, but I have an explanation, at least for this one.

Recall that I seldom drove, and didn't always have much say in the transport schedules concocted by my two co-tutoring pals at the time. Their motivations differed slightly from mine.

The New Albanian said...

Sloburn, are your quotes from something that was sent to you?

Have you ever wondered what it is that inspires so much hatred among the masked? After all, pretty much everyone is saying the same thing, only that we've not signed on with the "blame everything on the mayor" movement, preferring instead to look deeper at ... oh, wait. I guess that's it.

The New Albanian said...

Precisely, C.

It's a good way to avoid the charge being leveled against me.

Jeff Gillenwater said...

The only thing more startling than the level of codependence is the refusal to admit its impact.

We have a corrupt political system as a result of anonymous cowards and anonymous cowards as a result of a corrupt political system.

It's difficult to turn a corner in a circle.

Highwayman said...

True enough Bluegill, but if we can get them chasing their tails fast enough, perhaps the train will derail!